Need marriage advice

[Magpie2121]

I've been engaged to this girl in Pakistan for 9 years and she's my first cousin. I agreed to get engaged to her and it was all my idea as I really liked her at the time, even though I had just turned 17. My parents weren't too keen on the idea but I insisted on the engagement.
So after 9 years of being engaged, my family and I decided it was time I got married. My parents even asked me if I was still sure and whether I wanted to go ahead with it and I said yes.
So my parents went away to Pakistan to make the wedding arrangements and whilst they were gone I met this Pakistani kuri who lives locally and we went out on a couple of dates, first to a bar and then to a restaurant. Each date lasted only an hour or so.
Anyway, I told this girl here that I'm going to Pakistan but I didn't tell her I was going there to get married because I thought she might turn around and tell me to fuck off.
I was going to Pakistan with my elder brother who I can discuss anything with and whilst we were at the airport I told him about this girl I met here. I told him I was having second thoughts about getting married to my cousin in Pakistan but he said it was too late as my parents had already been in Pakistan for 2 weeks and all the arrangements had been made.
Also, whilst I was at the Airport, I was continuously on the phone to the girl I met here and was telling her I'm going away for just a holiday.
When I got to Pakistan, again I was continuously on the phone to the girl in England. On the day of the Mehndi I decided to tell the girl that I was getting married. She pleaded with me not to get married and insisted that if I came back to England tomorrow then she would marry me the same day.
I really liked this girl in the UK the minute I met her but didn't think she liked me that much, after all we had only met each other twice and been on just 2 dates.
I told her I couldn't cancel the wedding as my parents had made all the arrangements and all the guests and relatives had arrived. I even spoke to my mum and she also said it was too late and that it would be too much besti if I pulled out now. After all my cousin had waited 9 years for me and her parents were so happy to see me after 9 years. I decided to get married.
After the marriage I was still in touch with the girl from here via phone and she was unhappy that I didn't tell here I was going to get married. We chatted to each other every day and my wife was getting a bit suspicious. The UK girl said she wanted to meet me when I got back and so we arranged to go out for a night somewhere.
When I got back to the UK I met up with her and we went and stayed in a hotel for the night and things happened there. My wife is still in Pakistan waiting for her Visa. I told my parents that I want to get out of this marriage and be with the girl I met here but they got very upset and very angry and insisted that if I leave my cousin now then I'll also have to leave my parents' house. My mum was in tears and my elder brother found out what I wanted to do and he also got angry and he said that I have to stay with the wife for at least 6 months and see what happens from there because if the wife doesn't get to come here then again it will be a lot of besti on our family and on the wife's family in Pakistan.
The problem is I have feelings for the girl here and I know she likes me a lot but she insists that if my wife ever steps foot in this country then she'll never speak to me or see me again.
I still see the girl here every day and I know it's wrong but I have true feelings for her. She's on the same wavelength as me and we get on really well.
I'm in a sticky situation here and would appreciate any advice on what I should do from you people. Thanks and have fun and stay happy

[di vinci]

wat the fuck


:crazy:

artmali

[di vinci]

can u put it in bullet points plz

[Magpie2121]

can u put it in bullet points plz

If it was that easy I would have put a bullet through my own head and started again

[di vinci]

If it was that easy I would have put a bullet through my own head and started againbe a fooking man

have both

[piñacolada<3]

wow tell me you copy pasted this story from some indian movie?

[Magpie2121]

be a fooking man

have both

Lol, I've got both at the moment but only want 1. After all 1 girl is enough hassle as it is ;)

[Magpie2121]

wow tell me you copy pasted this story from some indian movie?

I'm thinking about making a movie on it, but I need an ending :rolleyes:

[_A-s-H-i_]

the fuck :ughpoke:

[shadds]

follow ur heart not ur dik ull be fine

[imsocrazii]

wow thats a tough situation

[Siesta]

oh my gosh dude....you should have stop it while in pakistan....now its either you gonna make a stand of you wont....you better make up your mind and do soemthing before you ruin that poor girl's life in pakistan...like seriously :arrow:

[Siesta]

wow thats a tough situation
yeah...and from the story he should have done something a long time ago

[imsocrazii]

oh my gosh dude....you should have stop it while in pakistan....now its either you gonna make a stand of you wont....you better make up your mind and do soemthing before you ruin that poor girl's life in pakistan...like seriously :arrow:
i wonder if he did anything with the girl in pakistan..

[Siesta]

i wonder if he did anything with the girl in pakistan..


oh God I hope he didnt :Pray:

[Magpie2121]

oh my gosh dude....you should have stop it while in pakistan....now its either you gonna make a stand of you wont....you better make up your mind and do soemthing before you ruin that poor girl's life in pakistan...like seriously :arrow:

I've told my wife but she says she'll kill herself if I leave her and that she can't live without me...WTF??

[shadds]

oh God I hope he didnt :Pray:

lets find out

[imsocrazii]

I've told my wife but she says she'll kill herself if I leave her and that she can't live without me...WTF??
how? do you love her?

[Magpie2121]

yeah...and from the story he should have done something a long time ago

There's nothing I could have done a long time ago. My wife is still in Pakistan so I've still got time.
Also, she forced herself onto me whilst I was there

[Hands]

lmao.its-ok-tho-you-can-have-four-wives
Stopbeingsuchafag

[Siesta]

I've told my wife but she says she'll kill herself if I leave her and that she can't live without me...WTF??

Well...here is the issue what are you willing to risk. I am not going to bash you...but you already know you put yourself in this situation. You know what to do, you just need to get some guts and do it!!

[Magpie2121]

how? do you love her?

I truly love the girl from here but I don't have feelings for my wife

[shadds]

lmao.its-ok-tho-you-can-have-four-wives
Stopbeingsuchafag

lolz yeh dude he got 2 more choices

[Magpie2121]

lmao.its-ok-tho-you-can-have-four-wives
Stopbeingsuchafag

Cool...I'll just have find 2 more then

[Hands]

exactly
/thread

[Siesta]

I truly love the girl from here but I don't have feelings for my wife

Well fix it now before its too late...really really!!!!

[imsocrazii]

I truly love the girl from here but I don't have feelings for my wife
you need to tell her that.

[shadds]

Cool...I'll just have find 2 more then

now that would be a great story

[Magpie2121]

Well...here is the issue what are you willing to risk. I am not going to bash you...but you already know you put yourself in this situation. You know what to do, you just need to get some guts and do it!!

I've got the guts but I don't wanna lose my family over this and besides the girl from here's family won't allow me to marry their daughter if my parents don't agree

[Hands]

you.need.to.get.a.nice.gori.like.imsocrazii.and.te ll.ur.fam.to.stfu

[Siesta]

I've got the guts but I don't wanna lose my family over this and besides the girl from here's family won't allow me to marry their daughter if my parents don't agree


You know God has a way of making you realise certain things. Sacrifices are going to made either way...you decide

[Siesta]

you.need.to.get.a.nice.gori.like.imsocrazii.and.te ll.ur.fam.to.stfu
:rofl: I am glad you can find humor in this :p

[imsocrazii]

you.need.to.get.a.nice.gori.like.imsocrazii.and.te ll.ur.fam.to.stfu
hands i love you.

[Siesta]

you need to tell her that.
:werd:

I think he dont want to tell her cause he mite lose everything..her his wife not to mention family

[Magpie2121]

you need to tell her that.

If I tell her then she might kill herslef, my family will disown me and the girl from here's parents won't allow me to marry their daughter unless my parents agree which they won't ](*,)

[imsocrazii]

i want to apply on shaadi dot com. :arrow:

[shadds]

If I tell her then she might kill herslef, my family will disown me and the girl from here's parents won't allow me to marry their daughter unless my parents agree which they won't ](*,)

ok but wat is ur plan so far???

[Siesta]

So the question still remains...if you leave your wife...if she still pure for marriage?

[imsocrazii]

If I tell her then she might kill herslef, my family will disown me and the girl from here's parents won't allow me to marry their daughter unless my parents agree which they won't ](*,)
why will your family disown you? i dont understand? wth?

[Siesta]

i want to apply on shaadi dot com. :arrow:
do it :hyper:

your chances are better than mine :D

[Magpie2121]

:werd:

I think he dont want to tell her cause he mite lose everything..her his wife not to mention family

To be honest I'm not too bothered about losing the wife. She's a really nice girl and had I not met the girl from here I wouldn't dream of leaving her

[cococrisp]

If I tell her then she might kill herslef, my family will disown me and the girl from here's parents won't allow me to marry their daughter unless my parents agree which they won't ](*,)

that's another way of sayin, im totally fucked for marryin a grill i didnt love,:Paper:....

[imsocrazii]

So the question still remains...if you leave your wife...if she still pure for marriage?
remember he told us she forced herself on him when he was there.

[Siesta]

If I tell her then she might kill herslef, my family will disown me and the girl from here's parents won't allow me to marry their daughter unless my parents agree which they won't ](*,)


would that girl marry you even if her parent disagrees?

[cococrisp]

wow tell me you copy pasted this story from some indian movie?

:roflbow:....

[Magpie2121]

So the question still remains...if you leave your wife...if she still pure for marriage?

I mentioned before that my wife pretty much forced herself onto me and that's the honest truth

[Siesta]

ok but wat is ur plan so far???
good question

[Siesta]

remember he told us she forced herself on him when he was there.
I missed that

[Siesta]

I mentioned before that my wife pretty much forced herself onto me and that's the honest truth
:ugh: :ugh: :ugh: wow dude.....you really should have done something about this before now......ok what is your plan...do you have one?

[cococrisp]

I mentioned before that my wife pretty much forced herself onto me and that's the honest truth

:drama:

[Magpie2121]

why will your family disown you? i dont understand? wth?

It's my mothers brothers daughter I married. And the wife has been very good to my family and she's done nothing wrong.
My parents think it's too much besti and I shouldn't divorce so soon

[Siesta]

:drama:
cocopuff :lol:

[Siesta]

It's my mothers brothers daughter I married. And the wife has been very good to my family and she's done nothing wrong.
My parents think it's too much besti and I shouldn't divorce so soon
moms are always rite...sometimes I wish i listen more to mine :)

[. :: a L i ::.]

Thats pretty ugly! how stupit of u wantin to marry ur cousin at first! even that u were 17!

[Siesta]

To be honest I'm not too bothered about losing the wife. She's a really nice girl and had I not met the girl from here I wouldn't dream of leaving her
that is good

[Magpie2121]

:ugh: :ugh: :ugh: wow dude.....you really should have done something about this before now......ok what is your plan...do you have one?

OK, my plan is to wait for the wife to come over and stay with her for 6 months. I know it's morally not the right thing to do but I don't think I've got an option here. After 6 months all my relatives and everyone in Pakistan will realise that things didn't work between us and I'll divorce her. My family are saying that if she doesn't come over now then all my relatives from here and those in Pakistan will be disgusted

[shadds]

It's my mothers brothers daughter I married. And the wife has been very good to my family and she's done nothing wrong.
My parents think it's too much besti and I shouldn't divorce so soon

tricky situation

[shadds]

OK, my plan is to wait for the wife to come over and stay with her for 6 months. I know it's morally not the right thing to do but I don't think I've got an option here. After 6 months all my relatives and everyone in Pakistan will realise that things didn't work between us and I'll divorce her. My family are saying that if she doesn't come over now then all my relatives from here and those in Pakistan will be disgusted

y six months??

[cococrisp]

cocopuff :lol:

hi,:lulz:....
desi drama at it's best....
more like paki drama at it's best, marrying into cuzin's is jus wrong as it is regardless of whatever,:Paper:....

wud u marry a cuzin, siesta?

[Siesta]

OK, my plan is to wait for the wife to come over and stay with her for 6 months. I know it's morally not the right thing to do but I don't think I've got an option here. After 6 months all my relatives and everyone in Pakistan will realise that things didn't work between us and I'll divorce her. My family are saying that if she doesn't come over now then all my relatives from here and those in Pakistan will be disgusted


So you doing them a favor....you better be clear about all of this expecially with yourr wife. Pretending will only create more confusion. During that 6 months no false pretense.

[Siesta]

hi,:lulz:....
desi drama at it's best....
more like paki drama at it's best, marrying into cuzin's is jus wrong as it is regardless of whatever,:Paper:....

wud u marry a cuzin, siesta?


no way and I dont understand it....but I will not ever judge it either

[cococrisp]

I'm gonna bore U2 death with my profile....here goes...just graduated from the University of Liverpool, been looking for a job for the last few months. Found a job yesterday, sarting work next week. 1 thing's for sure, I'm not looking forward to having to get up every morning and go to work in the freezing cold when, instead, I could be in my nice warm and cosy bed. I'm definitely not a morning person. I love chilling out with mates and going clubbing but most of all I love playing balls ;)


aww, u didnt mention that you're also engaged (for 9 years) to a girl who happens to be ur cuzin that u dont love,:lulz:....

p.s.
wtf :ugh:@ "...i love playin balls ;)"
u forgot the words, "with my"....

[Siesta]

tricky situation
sticky is more like


in this he needs to act fast, be clear, be bold, and fight for wat he wants.....and be absolutely positive and sure this is what he wants....I am sure he already is :)

[-Nidhi-]

I truly love the girl from here but I don't have feelings for my wife
:ugh: how could u not have feelings for ur wife? u've been engaged for 9 years... how long have u known the girl from england for?

[Siesta]

:ugh: how could u not have feelings for ur wife? u've been engaged for 9 years... how long have u known the girl from england for?


he hasnt exactly been intouch with her that long

[cococrisp]

lol so let's get this straight (i still think its all fake but i'll entertain you).

you wanted to marry your own first cousin when you were 17 and made her wait 9 years. now after you marry her, you decide to cheat on her.

with who? some girl you went on two dates with.


yeppppp, your cousin in pakiland who waited nine years for you really deserved that. good going, dude. you make desis everywhere proud. go you.

:rofla:....

[-Nidhi-]

he hasnt exactly been intouch with her that long
hmm that's kinda stupid, y would u leave ur wife for someone u haven't known that long

[Magpie2121]

I'm at work and my shift has finished. Thanks for all your replies. I have to go home now but I'll be back here 2mor.
Some useful information I can think about tonight ;)

[ORaNGe dAsY]

WTH! Are you freakin serious?! What the hell is wrong with you? And is your picture from your wedding?! :-s........:ugh:



Pathetic.

[shadds]

the question is has he slept with his wife from pakistan

[-Nidhi-]

WTH! Are you freakin serious?! What the hell is wrong with you? And is your picture from your wedding?! :-s........:ugh:



Pathetic.
:rofl: that's what i was going to ask

[Magpie2121]

When I was engaged to my wife, I used to call her every day for the first coupe of years or so. Eventually we drifted and the phone calls got less and less. For the last 5 years, I must have spoken to her about 5 times.
Anyways, I have to go now, thnx again for the comments

[Magpie2121]

no the pic is from my sisters wedding ;)

[Siesta]

hmm that's kinda stupid, y would u leave ur wife for someone u haven't known that long
hmmmmm.....who knows.....he hasnt exactly known his wife all them years either....not like they were talkin everyday...its all too crazy

[Siesta]

the question is has he slept with his wife from pakistan

yes :ugh:

[Siesta]

lol so let's get this straight (i still think its all fake but i'll entertain you).

you wanted to marry your own first cousin when you were 17 and made her wait 9 years. now after you marry her, you decide to cheat on her.

with who? some girl you went on two dates with.


yeppppp, your cousin in pakiland who waited nine years for you really deserved that. good going, dude. you make desis everywhere proud. go you.


that sums it up :-|

[shadds]

yes :ugh:

well that means hes a whore to

[-Nidhi-]

hmmmmm.....who knows.....he hasnt exactly known his wife all them years either....not like they were talkin everyday...its all too crazy
:yes:

[Siesta]

why should it matter if he has? if he made a commitment (and not just a personal commitment, but one that involves family... and mind you, its all his own family on both sides cuz he married his first cousin), it shouldn't matter if he had sex or not. the poor girl had to wait nine freakin years!

if he didnt want it, he could have ended it.

if he got cold feet right before the wedding, he coulda stopped it then.

if he was unsure even after the wedding, he didn't have to come back and sleep with some broad he's gone out on two dates with.



maaaan, now i know what all these desi girls be bitching about.

yes this is a serious matter....and he should have done the rite thing in the beginning...now lives can be ruined :-|

[Siesta]

well that means hes a whore to

:-|

men even they can be confused too

[shadds]

:-|

men even they can be confused too

true but he shud av been a man and called the marriage off.......... fair play even men get confused but either way one of the gurls gna get hurt.... that aint rite

[uglyDuckling]

What the hell!

Okay, mistake #1

You shouldn't have dated right before marriage. Like WTF! You are bound to like someone you just started dating and especially before marriage because you might have been nervous and needed an excuse to get out or needed a distraction.

Mistake #2

Constantly talking to the UK chick even after you were married. Yo! You are commited to someone. You have a responsibility towards someone now. Someone depends on you.

Mistake #3

Meeting the girl and staying with her for a night AND messing around with her. Buddy, you cheated on your wife. Okay, did nothing cross your head at the time? Oh maybe a thought that said "I might be doing something wrong".

Man, you have no control.

I say that you man up and leave that BI*** that's jumping over your shlong. Tell her to take a hike. You're a married man now.

And your cousin/wife and you stayed commited for 9 years. Buddy, that has a lot of value. Don't throw it away for some lass you've known only for a couple of weeks.

[PRCIV]

Make the Paki girl you just met your second wife, problem solved :Paper:

[jay_desi]

dont do it.... marraige is the end of your life.....

[Hands]

ur`gay

[Dream_GirL]

I've been engaged to this girl in Pakistan for 9 years and she's my first cousin. I agreed to get engaged to her and it was all my idea as I really liked her at the time, even though I had just turned 17. My parents weren't too keen on the idea but I insisted on the engagement.
So after 9 years of being engaged, my family and I decided it was time I got married. My parents even asked me if I was still sure and whether I wanted to go ahead with it and I said yes.
So my parents went away to Pakistan to make the wedding arrangements and whilst they were gone I met this Pakistani kuri who lives locally and we went out on a couple of dates, first to a bar and then to a restaurant. Each date lasted only an hour or so.
Anyway, I told this girl here that I'm going to Pakistan but I didn't tell her I was going there to get married because I thought she might turn around and tell me to fuck off.
I was going to Pakistan with my elder brother who I can discuss anything with and whilst we were at the airport I told him about this girl I met here. I told him I was having second thoughts about getting married to my cousin in Pakistan but he said it was too late as my parents had already been in Pakistan for 2 weeks and all the arrangements had been made.
Also, whilst I was at the Airport, I was continuously on the phone to the girl I met here and was telling her I'm going away for just a holiday.
When I got to Pakistan, again I was continuously on the phone to the girl in England. On the day of the Mehndi I decided to tell the girl that I was getting married. She pleaded with me not to get married and insisted that if I came back to England tomorrow then she would marry me the same day.
I really liked this girl in the UK the minute I met her but didn't think she liked me that much, after all we had only met each other twice and been on just 2 dates.
I told her I couldn't cancel the wedding as my parents had made all the arrangements and all the guests and relatives had arrived. I even spoke to my mum and she also said it was too late and that it would be too much besti if I pulled out now. After all my cousin had waited 9 years for me and her parents were so happy to see me after 9 years. I decided to get married.
After the marriage I was still in touch with the girl from here via phone and she was unhappy that I didn't tell here I was going to get married. We chatted to each other every day and my wife was getting a bit suspicious. The UK girl said she wanted to meet me when I got back and so we arranged to go out for a night somewhere.
When I got back to the UK I met up with her and we went and stayed in a hotel for the night and things happened there. My wife is still in Pakistan waiting for her Visa. I told my parents that I want to get out of this marriage and be with the girl I met here but they got very upset and very angry and insisted that if I leave my cousin now then I'll also have to leave my parents' house. My mum was in tears and my elder brother found out what I wanted to do and he also got angry and he said that I have to stay with the wife for at least 6 months and see what happens from there because if the wife doesn't get to come here then again it will be a lot of besti on our family and on the wife's family in Pakistan.
The problem is I have feelings for the girl here and I know she likes me a lot but she insists that if my wife ever steps foot in this country then she'll never speak to me or see me again.
I still see the girl here every day and I know it's wrong but I have true feelings for her. She's on the same wavelength as me and we get on really well.
I'm in a sticky situation here and would appreciate any advice on what I should do from you people. Thanks and have fun and stay happy
OMG... i need tym to reply 2 dis 1 hang on im at work.. ill get back 2 u..

[~sweetthing~]

I've been engaged to this girl in Pakistan for 9 years and she's my first cousin. I agreed to get engaged to her and it was all my idea as I really liked her at the time, even though I had just turned 17. My parents weren't too keen on the idea but I insisted on the engagement.
So after 9 years of being engaged, my family and I decided it was time I got married. My parents even asked me if I was still sure and whether I wanted to go ahead with it and I said yes.
So my parents went away to Pakistan to make the wedding arrangements and whilst they were gone I met this Pakistani kuri who lives locally and we went out on a couple of dates, first to a bar and then to a restaurant. Each date lasted only an hour or so.
Anyway, I told this girl here that I'm going to Pakistan but I didn't tell her I was going there to get married because I thought she might turn around and tell me to fuck off.
I was going to Pakistan with my elder brother who I can discuss anything with and whilst we were at the airport I told him about this girl I met here. I told him I was having second thoughts about getting married to my cousin in Pakistan but he said it was too late as my parents had already been in Pakistan for 2 weeks and all the arrangements had been made.
Also, whilst I was at the Airport, I was continuously on the phone to the girl I met here and was telling her I'm going away for just a holiday.
When I got to Pakistan, again I was continuously on the phone to the girl in England. On the day of the Mehndi I decided to tell the girl that I was getting married. She pleaded with me not to get married and insisted that if I came back to England tomorrow then she would marry me the same day.
I really liked this girl in the UK the minute I met her but didn't think she liked me that much, after all we had only met each other twice and been on just 2 dates.
I told her I couldn't cancel the wedding as my parents had made all the arrangements and all the guests and relatives had arrived. I even spoke to my mum and she also said it was too late and that it would be too much besti if I pulled out now. After all my cousin had waited 9 years for me and her parents were so happy to see me after 9 years. I decided to get married.
After the marriage I was still in touch with the girl from here via phone and she was unhappy that I didn't tell here I was going to get married. We chatted to each other every day and my wife was getting a bit suspicious. The UK girl said she wanted to meet me when I got back and so we arranged to go out for a night somewhere.
When I got back to the UK I met up with her and we went and stayed in a hotel for the night and things happened there. My wife is still in Pakistan waiting for her Visa. I told my parents that I want to get out of this marriage and be with the girl I met here but they got very upset and very angry and insisted that if I leave my cousin now then I'll also have to leave my parents' house. My mum was in tears and my elder brother found out what I wanted to do and he also got angry and he said that I have to stay with the wife for at least 6 months and see what happens from there because if the wife doesn't get to come here then again it will be a lot of besti on our family and on the wife's family in Pakistan.
The problem is I have feelings for the girl here and I know she likes me a lot but she insists that if my wife ever steps foot in this country then she'll never speak to me or see me again.
I still see the girl here every day and I know it's wrong but I have true feelings for her. She's on the same wavelength as me and we get on really well.
I'm in a sticky situation here and would appreciate any advice on what I should do from you people. Thanks and have fun and stay happy

You IDIOT!! You are going to cause the death of your wife, your UK girlfriend will kill her while she is pregnant with your child, and she will be arrested, just stop everything now and go back to the wife you have. :ugh:

[~sweetthing~]

http://www.nriinternet.com/NRI_Murdered/UK/A_Z/S/Harmohinder_Sanghera/Harmohinder_Sanghera.htm


Anyone remember this story!!
DE JA VU!!!

Let's slaughter this idiot before he ruins the lives of those two women!!

[hakuna-matata]

Your married by your own virtue and not because of family/parental pressure. Before she has even been given a chance to be your wife, you realise you might have made a mistake (which is totally senseless). YOU made the mistake so no one but YOU must bear the burden - not her, not your family, YOU.

Remember, it is your matrimonial duty as a husband to not only care for her, but also love her with all your heart.

Sometimes it's just too late to turn back lad.

God speed.

[~sweetthing~]

Your married by your own virtue and not because of family/parental pressure. Before she has even been given a chance to be your wife, you realise you might have made a mistake (which is totally senseless). YOU made the mistake so no one but YOU must bear the burden - not her, not your family, YOU.

Remember, it is your matrimonial duty as a husband to not only care for her, but also love her with all your heart.

Sometimes it's just too late to turn back lad.

God speed.
:werd:
and he ACTUALLY thought people would sympathize with him :rolleyes:

[XxXanamikaXxX]

You are fucked.

How the hell do you plan to marry someone after 2 dates? :ugh: Your mind is telling you wrong stuff. You would be an arse to leave your wife, as you are the one who first insised to get married to her.
Damn you, playboys.

[Presence]

Like someone mentioned this uk girl is a hoe, sleep/made out with a newly wedded, fuck they went out on two dates aswell.

Just marry them both one for the uk and one for pakistan. If the's only one then I say go for the one in pakistan no matter how much your bollywood love is skewing with your logic.

[SaMeeeeR]

wow thats a tough situation
ur gay

[SaMeeeeR]

I've been engaged to this girl in Pakistan for 9 years and she's my first cousin. I agreed to get engaged to her and it was all my idea as I really liked her at the time, even though I had just turned 17. My parents weren't too keen on the idea but I insisted on the engagement.
So after 9 years of being engaged, my family and I decided it was time I got married. My parents even asked me if I was still sure and whether I wanted to go ahead with it and I said yes.
So my parents went away to Pakistan to make the wedding arrangements and whilst they were gone I met this Pakistani kuri who lives locally and we went out on a couple of dates, first to a bar and then to a restaurant. Each date lasted only an hour or so.
Anyway, I told this girl here that I'm going to Pakistan but I didn't tell her I was going there to get married because I thought she might turn around and tell me to fuck off.
I was going to Pakistan with my elder brother who I can discuss anything with and whilst we were at the airport I told him about this girl I met here. I told him I was having second thoughts about getting married to my cousin in Pakistan but he said it was too late as my parents had already been in Pakistan for 2 weeks and all the arrangements had been made.
Also, whilst I was at the Airport, I was continuously on the phone to the girl I met here and was telling her I'm going away for just a holiday.
When I got to Pakistan, again I was continuously on the phone to the girl in England. On the day of the Mehndi I decided to tell the girl that I was getting married. She pleaded with me not to get married and insisted that if I came back to England tomorrow then she would marry me the same day.
I really liked this girl in the UK the minute I met her but didn't think she liked me that much, after all we had only met each other twice and been on just 2 dates.
I told her I couldn't cancel the wedding as my parents had made all the arrangements and all the guests and relatives had arrived. I even spoke to my mum and she also said it was too late and that it would be too much besti if I pulled out now. After all my cousin had waited 9 years for me and her parents were so happy to see me after 9 years. I decided to get married.
After the marriage I was still in touch with the girl from here via phone and she was unhappy that I didn't tell here I was going to get married. We chatted to each other every day and my wife was getting a bit suspicious. The UK girl said she wanted to meet me when I got back and so we arranged to go out for a night somewhere.
When I got back to the UK I met up with her and we went and stayed in a hotel for the night and things happened there. My wife is still in Pakistan waiting for her Visa. I told my parents that I want to get out of this marriage and be with the girl I met here but they got very upset and very angry and insisted that if I leave my cousin now then I'll also have to leave my parents' house. My mum was in tears and my elder brother found out what I wanted to do and he also got angry and he said that I have to stay with the wife for at least 6 months and see what happens from there because if the wife doesn't get to come here then again it will be a lot of besti on our family and on the wife's family in Pakistan.
The problem is I have feelings for the girl here and I know she likes me a lot but she insists that if my wife ever steps foot in this country then she'll never speak to me or see me again.
I still see the girl here every day and I know it's wrong but I have true feelings for her. She's on the same wavelength as me and we get on really well.
I'm in a sticky situation here and would appreciate any advice on what I should do from you people. Thanks and have fun and stay happy
lol u shud try 3 sum wid dem

[Presence]

lol u shud try 3 sum wid dem

hahahha lolol ur bare immature, sick tatoo though i've always wanted one on ma neck

[SaMeeeeR]

hahahha lolol ur bare immature, sick tatoo though i've always wanted one on ma neck
lol thanks bruv ..u can get one too :D

[nyc_guy_sx]

bro could i borrow your script. this sounds like imran hashmi's film

[supremed]

you need to give up the chick in the uk...ur married

[Magpie2121]

ur gay

Most people are saying I should stick by my wife, I think I might just do that regardless of how much I love the girl from here. And I loved her A LOT

[Magpie2121]

http://www.nriinternet.com/NRI_Murdered/UK/A_Z/S/Harmohinder_Sanghera/Harmohinder_Sanghera.htm


Anyone remember this story!!
DE JA VU!!!

Let's slaughter this idiot before he ruins the lives of those two women!!

Fuck me the girl in the story looks exactly like the UK girl

[Magpie2121]

:werd:
and he ACTUALLY thought people would sympathize with him :rolleyes:

I'm not looking for any sympathy U dumb fuck. If you read my post at the beginning you'll realise I need advice. Maybe U can't read

[cant.rate.me]

you need to give up the chick in the uk...ur married

its true ur married now.. unless u ask ur wifes permission 2 get married 2 her aswel lol

[Magpie2121]

its true ur married now.. unless u ask ur wifes permission 2 get married 2 her aswel lol

Lol. Yeah well that's what most people are saying, that I should stick by my wife regardless of how much I love the girl from here.
I asked the UK girl for a laugh if she'd be my second wife, needless to say she declined

[cant.rate.me]

Lol. Yeah well that's what most people are saying, that I should stick by my wife regardless of how much I love the girl from here.
I asked the UK girl for a laugh if she'd be my second wife, needless to say she declined

hmm wel then my friend u have no option but to tell ur wife the truth, as crazy as it sounds..
coz its not fair on her, i meen does she know u dont love her?, or do u stil act like u do?, coz if ur pretending that u love her that is very wrong

[Magpie2121]

hmm wel then my friend u have no option but to tell ur wife the truth, as crazy as it sounds..
coz its not fair on her, i meen does she know u dont love her?, or do u stil act like u do?, coz if ur pretending that u love her that is very wrong

I'm just thinking I'm married now and I should never have got myself in this situation. I can't marry the UK girl cos my family won't agree to it. If I tell my wife everything then she'll be very upset and when she gets here she will never trust me, we've only been married a couple of months and for her to never trust me for the rest of her life will be a hard pill to swallow

[miss_kuti_kamini]

It's my mothers brothers daughter I married. And the wife has been very good to my family and she's done nothing wrong.
My parents think it's too much besti and I shouldn't divorce so soon

your a fuking prick. it's men like you who destroy women's lives, that poor cousin of yours, she does not deserve a fuking asshole of a husband like you.

you say you don't 'love' your wife, well, you dumb ignorant twat, that comes in time, esp with arranged marriages, you have to give it time and effort.but your so obsessed and blinded with this new girl, that your not even thinking about anything else, least alone your family.

your married now, fix up you twat, this is not a game, your playing with your cousins life, you want to divorce her for some hoe? do you have ANY idea the stigma attached to a divorced girl? that poor girl.

this happened to my sister, she married our 1st cousin,both agreed to it etc, and he fukin divorced her straight off because he met some hoe after their wedding, and wasnt prepared to even make any effort or work on his marriage. I know the pain my sister went through first hand , and the besti that came along with it.

life and marriage is not a fuking game u idiot.
men like you need to have their dicks chopped off and fuking bitch slapped.

Your a FUKING IDIOTIC MORON.

[Magpie2121]

your a fuking prick. it's men like you who destroy women's lives, that poor cousin of yours, she does not deserve a fuking asshole of a husband like you.

you say you don't 'love' your wife, well, you dumb ignorant twat, that comes in time, esp with arranged marriages, you have to give it time and effort.but your so obsessed and blinded with this new girl, that your not even thinking about anything else, least alone your family.

your married now, fix up you twat, this is not a game, your playing with your cousins life, you want to divorce her for some hoe? do you have ANY idea the stigma attached to a divorced girl? that poor girl.

this happened to my sister, she married our 1st cousin,both agreed to it etc, and he fukin divorced her straight off because he met some hoe after their wedding, and wasnt prepared to even make any effort or work on his marriage. I know the pain my sister went through first hand , and the besti that came along with it.

life and marriage is not a fuking game u idiot.
men like you need to have their dicks chopped off and fuking bitch slapped.

Your a FUKING IDIOTIC MORON.

Just cos your hoe sister got what she deserved you don't need to call me names you slut. Just cos this happened to your sister U dnt need to take your anger out on me.
I'm getting advice from people here, I'm not here to be called names so if you dnt have anything positive to say then just go fuck yourself and your hoe sister too.
I haven't divorced my wife although admittedly I've made a mistake which I'm trying to rectify.

[miss_kuti_kamini]

Just cos your hoe sister got what she deserved you don't need to call me names you slut. Just cos this happened to your sister U dnt need to take your anger out on me.
I'm getting advice from people here, I'm not here to be called names so if you dnt have anything positive to say then just go fuck yourself and your hoe sister too.
I haven't divorced my wife although admittedly I've made a mistake which I'm trying to rectify.

Fuk you
i'm not taking out my anger on what happened to my sister on you, u idiot, i'm comparing you to him, because the way your thinking and your past actions, and some of your comments on this thread. Idiot, don't you dare say my sis got what she desereved. wanker.
you stated on this thread that you can't divorce her just yet as it is too soon, and i'm voicing my opinion on that comment, you idiot.

Your clearly not a man, what kind of man links some next girl just after getting married and stays overnight in a hotel and gets up to all sorts with her?
A PRICK.
so yes, i can call u as many names as i like, because you deserve it.

if your trying to rectify it, it's obvious what you have to do, forget the hoe you slept with, and work on your marriage, give your wife a chance and maybe love will come.

[desi_uk]

Fuk you
i'm not taking out my anger on what happened to my sister on you, u idiot, i'm comparing you to him, because the way your thinking and your past actions, and some of your comments on this thread. Idiot, don't you dare say my sis got what she desereved. wanker.
you stated on this thread that you can't divorce her just yet as it is too soon, and i'm voicing my opinion on that comment, you idiot.

Your clearly not a man, what kind of man links some next girl just after getting married and stays overnight in a hotel and gets up to all sorts with her?
A PRICK.
so yes, i can call u as many names as i like, because you deserve it.

if your trying to rectify it, it's obvious what you have to do, forget the hoe you slept with, and work on your marriage, give your wife a chance and maybe love will come.

wtf chill out no point swearing at the guy he asked for advice you need to know how to speak to people without calling them a prick etc

[miss_kuti_kamini]

wtf chill out no point swearing at the guy he asked for advice you need to know how to speak to people without calling them a prick etc

i know very well how to speak to ppl without swearing.
But some ppl deserve it.

[desi_uk]

i know very well how to speak to ppl without swearing.
But some ppl deserve it.
okee dokee

[Presence]

your a fuking prick. it's men like you who destroy women's lives, that poor cousin of yours, she does not deserve a fuking asshole of a husband like you.

you say you don't 'love' your wife, well, you dumb ignorant twat, that comes in time, esp with arranged marriages, you have to give it time and effort.but your so obsessed and blinded with this new girl, that your not even thinking about anything else, least alone your family.

your married now, fix up you twat, this is not a game, your playing with your cousins life, you want to divorce her for some hoe? do you have ANY idea the stigma attached to a divorced girl? that poor girl.

this happened to my sister, she married our 1st cousin,both agreed to it etc, and he fukin divorced her straight off because he met some hoe after their wedding, and wasnt prepared to even make any effort or work on his marriage. I know the pain my sister went through first hand , and the besti that came along with it.

life and marriage is not a fuking game u idiot.
men like you need to have their dicks chopped off and fuking bitch slapped.

Your a FUKING IDIOTIC MORON.

I think im in love. Btw your name makes me giggle like a girl

[miss_kuti_kamini]

I think im in love. Btw your name makes me giggle like a girl

lol,then my job here is done!

[gorjuzkuri]

9 years ago u were all about marrying the girl in paki...So, what makes you think this isnt the same feeling again...that you just wanna marry this girl. I had a friend that had been engaged only for three years and she was in the US and her fiancee in Paki...and it was just distance that was making them fall apart so hard. And, once they met again and got reaquainted with each other...they were just fine. I think you just havent gotten the right amount of time to fall in love with your wife. And, if your wife is willing to accept you even after this whole love thing uve got going on then...u need to stick with her. Although, its easier said than done. However, if you feel you cannot fulfill the desires and requirements of your wife then you should let her go before things get even worse. But, remember u are risking your family and a wife for this new found love of yours. At the same time, realize that the girl that you married has waited 9 years...thats a lot...and obviously she must not be that young anymore either. Shes gonna have a hard time getting remarried as she has aged and is a divorcee. Put everything into consideration. I would say follow your heart...but, i know if i was in your situation i would have done what was right traditionally.

[desi_uk]

9 years ago u were all about marrying the girl in paki...So, what makes you think this isnt the same feeling again...that you just wanna marry this girl. I had a friend that had been engaged only for three years and she was in the US and her fiancee in Paki...and it was just distance that was making them fall apart so hard. And, once they met again and got reaquainted with each other...they were just fine. I think you just havent gotten the right amount of time to fall in love with your wife. And, if your wife is willing to accept you even after this whole love thing uve got going on then...u need to stick with her. Although, its easier said than done. However, if you feel you cannot fulfill the desires and requirements of your wife then you should let her go before things get even worse. But, remember u are risking your family and a wife for this new found love of yours. At the same time, realize that the girl that you married has waited 9 years...thats a lot...and obviously she must not be that young anymore either. Shes gonna have a hard time getting remarried as she has aged and is a divorcee. Put everything into consideration. I would say follow your heart...but, i know if i was in your situation i would have done what was right traditionally.
good post

[vsaigal]

ure a cunt.

sorry. its f'in tur.

[Magpie2121]

Fuk you
i'm not taking out my anger on what happened to my sister on you, u idiot, i'm comparing you to him, because the way your thinking and your past actions, and some of your comments on this thread. Idiot, don't you dare say my sis got what she desereved. wanker.
you stated on this thread that you can't divorce her just yet as it is too soon, and i'm voicing my opinion on that comment, you idiot.

Your clearly not a man, what kind of man links some next girl just after getting married and stays overnight in a hotel and gets up to all sorts with her?
A PRICK.
so yes, i can call u as many names as i like, because you deserve it.

if your trying to rectify it, it's obvious what you have to do, forget the hoe you slept with, and work on your marriage, give your wife a chance and maybe love will come.

U didn't like it when I said your sister got what she deserved just the way I don't like being called names. I'm here for advice not to take or read abuse from sum1 I don't even know.
Like I say I've made a mistake and I need as much advice as possible in order to do the right thing for every1 here. The last thing I need is to hear abuse. I'm sorry for saying what I said about your sister

[gorjuzkuri]

Just cos your hoe sister got what she deserved you don't need to call me names you slut. Just cos this happened to your sister U dnt need to take your anger out on me.
I'm getting advice from people here, I'm not here to be called names so if you dnt have anything positive to say then just go fuck yourself and your hoe sister too.
I haven't divorced my wife although admittedly I've made a mistake which I'm trying to rectify.
Dude, that was uncalled for...you shouldnt have called her sister a hoe. i shouldve just taken back what i had to say in my earlier advice. No matter how her response is towards you, you shouldve had a little respect for her. And, seeing that shes seen someone suffer through a tragic story like this...you still proceeded in calling her sister a hoe...which was really sad.

And, same applies to the girl in a sense too...I guess shes a bit emotional and i can see why.

[Magpie2121]

wtf chill out no point swearing at the guy he asked for advice you need to know how to speak to people without calling them a prick etc

Some people are just bought up this way, it's not really their fault I suppose

[desi_uk]

Some people are just bought up this way, it's not really their fault I suppose
how come you dont love the woman youre with?

[gorjuzkuri]

good post
Thanks :love:

[gorjuzkuri]

how come you dont love the woman youre with?
Precisely, my question...

[Magpie2121]

ure a cunt.

sorry. its f'in tur.

:english:

Are all your 6000 odd posts this illiterately written. Retard

[desi_uk]

Precisely, my question...
ive never been in love so maybe im not the best person to answer

but what ive heard is that you have to work at it but sometimes things can get that bad that the only way out is to leave

[Magpie2121]

9 years ago u were all about marrying the girl in paki...So, what makes you think this isnt the same feeling again...that you just wanna marry this girl. I had a friend that had been engaged only for three years and she was in the US and her fiancee in Paki...and it was just distance that was making them fall apart so hard. And, once they met again and got reaquainted with each other...they were just fine. I think you just havent gotten the right amount of time to fall in love with your wife. And, if your wife is willing to accept you even after this whole love thing uve got going on then...u need to stick with her. Although, its easier said than done. However, if you feel you cannot fulfill the desires and requirements of your wife then you should let her go before things get even worse. But, remember u are risking your family and a wife for this new found love of yours. At the same time, realize that the girl that you married has waited 9 years...thats a lot...and obviously she must not be that young anymore either. Shes gonna have a hard time getting remarried as she has aged and is a divorcee. Put everything into consideration. I would say follow your heart...but, i know if i was in your situation i would have done what was right traditionally.

Thanks for your informative comments. I obviously feel bad about what I've done otherwise I wouldn't be here.
Some really useful advice and the main thing is my wife has been waiting 9 years and so she's been very loyal to me and my family. Maybe I'll have to follow my head rather than my heart although my heart is with the girl here

[Magpie2121]

how come you dont love the woman youre with?

She's still in Pakistan and has changed quite a bit since I got engaged to her. She wears the full hijab and burka over her face which I don't have a problem with at all but in general she's totally changed and she always talks about religion (which again I don't have a problem with) but her personality has totally changed since the last time I met her.

[gorjuzkuri]

ive never been in love so maybe im not the best person to answer

but what ive heard is that you have to work at it but sometimes things can get that bad that the only way out is to leave
yep...its better to leave the mirror broken than trying to fix the mirror with broken shards...cause, you are guaranteed to get hurt even more.
Its a very 50/50 kinda thing so to speak. As, i have a bf and he is, im talking, countries away and has been for the past two years. And, we are just ready to pull each others hair out. We cant even remember what it was that we fell in love with...but are waiting for the day that we meet each other and get a chance to get reacquainted. We break up about every other week, yet never cease to talk countlessly about each other. My thoughts on our love is pretty simple- if it happens its great-if it doesnt its even greater. If you keep that in your mind... i guess breaks up dont feel that harsh.

[Magpie2121]

Dude, that was uncalled for...you shouldnt have called her sister a hoe. i shouldve just taken back what i had to say in my earlier advice. No matter how her response is towards you, you shouldve had a little respect for her. And, seeing that shes seen someone suffer through a tragic story like this...you still proceeded in calling her sister a hoe...which was really sad.

And, same applies to the girl in a sense too...I guess shes a bit emotional and i can see why.

I've already apologised to her

[desi_uk]

She's still in Pakistan and has changed quite a bit since I got engaged to her. She wears the full hijab and burka over her face which I don't have a problem with at all but in general she's totally changed and she always talks about religion (which again I don't have a problem with) but her personality has totally changed since the last time I met her.
I think you should give it time and be patience sometimes time heals and makes things better running away is not always the answer

[gorjuzkuri]

I've already apologised to her
good job! :D

[desi_uk]

yep...its better to leave the mirror broken than trying to fix the mirror with broken shards...cause, you are guaranteed to get hurt even more.
Its a very 50/50 kinda thing so to speak. As, i have a bf and he is, im talking, countries away and has been for the past two years. And, we are just ready to pull each others hair out. We cant even remember what it was that we fell in love with...but are waiting for the day that we meet each other and get a chance to get reacquainted. We break up about every other week, yet never cease to talk countlessly about each other. My thoughts on our love is pretty simple- if it happens its great-if it doesnt its even greater. If you keep that in your mind... i guess breaks up dont feel that harsh.
Sometimes people be with someone for the sake of it but what is love we must ask ourselves many people mistake love with lust and i dont just mean the sex lust.
People can lose interest in the one theyre with why because they not trying hard enough to love each other, should we put effort into loving the person were with or does it come naturally i think its a game of give and take.

[Magpie2121]

Sometimes people be with someone for the sake of it but what is love we must ask ourselves many people mistake love with lust and i dont just mean the sex lust.
People can lose interest in the one theyre with why because they not trying hard enough to love each other, should we put effort into loving the person were with or does it come naturally i think its a game of give and take.

I would say I was in love with my wife when I initially got engaged to her around 9 years ago. Over the course of time, probably after around 2-3 years my feeling for her started to fade. I kept in touch with her via phone for the fiirst 2 years or so but she didn't really seem that interested in talking to me. I must have wrote her 10-15 letters in the first 2 years of our engagement but she only wrote 1 back to me.
Eventually I started calling her less and that's probably why my love for her faded. I thought I'd be able to rekindle the love I had for her after the marriage but like I say she seems to be a different person altogether. Either that or I haven't spent enough time with her

[Magpie2121]

My thoughts on our love is pretty simple- if it happens its great-if it doesnt its even greater. If you keep that in your mind... i guess breaks up dont feel that harsh.

That's nice

[desi_uk]

I would say I was in love with my wife when I initially got engaged to her around 9 years ago. Over the course of time, probably after around 2-3 years my feeling for her started to fade. I kept in touch with her via phone for the fiirst 2 years or so but she didn't really seem that interested in talking to me. I must have wrote her 10-15 letters in the first 2 years of our engagement but she only wrote 1 back to me.
Eventually I started calling her less and that's probably why my love for her faded. I thought I'd be able to rekindle the love I had for her after the marriage but like I say she seems to be a different person altogether. Either that or I haven't spent enough time with her
why doesnt she live with you?

[Geeeeez]

:shock: :shock: thats quite a situation you got there mate

i know this wont help now, but gettin engaged at 17?! u gotta admit that was a bad idea, and thats whats lead to this situation

[gorjuzkuri]

Sometimes people be with someone for the sake of it but what is love we must ask ourselves many people mistake love with lust and i dont just mean the sex lust.
People can lose interest in the one theyre with why because they not trying hard enough to love each other, should we put effort into loving the person were with or does it come naturally i think its a game of give and take.
Totally agree on that last line. Its the same with us...sometimes, i wonder are we doing this just to make it. Its not that we have lost interest though...but the circumstances put in front of us are i mean ridiculously hard to overcome. When we were together in person though...it was the most amazing bond ever...and i guess we are just waiting for it to happen again. I read this somewhere and i never really quite let go of the concept..."love will always be there in some sort of shape, size, or form"...in context, it was talking about how love can also turn into the form of hate...but, one will only hate u if they have feelings towards you. Its when you cant get any feelings or any reactions out of them...is when its scary and not love. As well as love is a compromise in a sense...to better each other for the well being...but to enjoy the other as an individual.

[desi_uk]

:shock: :shock: thats quite a situation you got there mate

i know this wont help now, but gettin engaged at 17?! u gotta admit that was a bad idea, and thats whats lead to this situation
not in all cases my friend got married at 17 he is happily married with 5 children Ma'shallah

[Geeeeez]

not in all cases my friend got married at 17 he is happily married with 5 children Ma'shallah

yeh gettin married at 17, and getting engaged at 17 and then waiting for 9 years till u get married are two completly different things mate

[addiction01]

She forced herself on you? Dude you need to be hanged.

[desi_uk]

Totally agree on that last line. Its the same with us...sometimes, i wonder are we doing this just to make it. Its not that we have lost interest though...but the circumstances put in front of us are i mean ridiculously hard to overcome. When we were together in person though...it was the most amazing bond ever...and i guess we are just waiting for it to happen again. I read this somewhere and i never really quite let go of the concept..."love will always be there in some sort of shape, size, or form"...in context, it was talking about how love can also turn into the form of hate...but, one will only hate u if they have feelings towards you. Its when you cant get any feelings or any reactions out of them...is when its scary and not love. As well as love is a compromise in a sense...to better each other for the well being...but to enjoy the other as an individual.
Yes love does come in all shapes and sizes some people rarely ever say to their partner the three magic words but they show their appreciation in other ways by buying them stuff or helping them etc

I dont think there has ever been any marriage or relationship that has never had problems thats what love is about can you always smile and agree with the person you are married to or love.

We are people at the end of the day nothing is perfect thats why we have to work at it if you truly do love them then you will work at it otherwise theres no point.

[itismyusername]

I would say I was in love with my wife when I initially got engaged to her around 9 years ago. Over the course of time, probably after around 2-3 years my feeling for her started to fade. I kept in touch with her via phone for the fiirst 2 years or so but she didn't really seem that interested in talking to me. I must have wrote her 10-15 letters in the first 2 years of our engagement but she only wrote 1 back to me.
Eventually I started calling her less and that's probably why my love for her faded. I thought I'd be able to rekindle the love I had for her after the marriage but like I say she seems to be a different person altogether. Either that or I haven't spent enough time with her
you never went back to desiland in those 9 years?
if she didn't make a move, at least you should have...should have visited your family and her...it would have showed that you wanted her.

[gorjuzkuri]

That's nice
my mom always taught me that...she said...agar kuch ho tho acha hai...and believe it or not...agar na ho...tho samjho...aur bhi accha hai. Ive kinda grasped that concept in my daily life. And, i guess if it doesnt happen theres surely a greater reason behind it for sure.

[Siesta]

Thanks for your informative comments. I obviously feel bad about what I've done otherwise I wouldn't be here.
Some really useful advice and the main thing is my wife has been waiting 9 years and so she's been very loyal to me and my family. Maybe I'll have to follow my head rather than my heart although my heart is with the girl here


you will do the right thing.....go and make us proud :)

[Magpie2121]

:shock: :shock: thats quite a situation you got there mate

i know this wont help now, but gettin engaged at 17?! u gotta admit that was a bad idea, and thats whats lead to this situation

Thats' the root of the problem. I was young and stupid to get engaged at that time but I really was in love then

[Magpie2121]

why doesnt she live with you?

I've only been married for 2 months. She's still in Pakistan waiting for her visa

[Siesta]

my mom always taught me that...she said...agar kuch ho tho acha hai...and believe it or not...agar na ho...tho samjho...aur bhi accha hai. Ive kinda grasped that concept in my daily life. And, i guess if it doesnt happen theres surely a greater reason behind it for sure.
thats what I said earlier

[miss_kuti_kamini]

Dude, that was uncalled for...you shouldnt have called her sister a hoe. i shouldve just taken back what i had to say in my earlier advice. No matter how her response is towards you, you shouldve had a little respect for her. And, seeing that shes seen someone suffer through a tragic story like this...you still proceeded in calling her sister a hoe...which was really sad.

And, same applies to the girl in a sense too...I guess shes a bit emotional and i can see why.


many thanks for that post gorjuzkuri,
he cannot even realise why i am so angry at his behaviour and why i called him names,as i have seen a man just like him ruin my sisters life, and i did not want him to ruin his cousins's life.
fair enough, i should'nt have swore at him, but he had to stoop to saying that about my sister.He show's lack of respect to women, least of all his wife, he performed his Nikah at the wedding, and then he goes and did what he did. Some people are beyond reasoning with.

[SaMeeeeR]

many thanks for that post gorjuzkuri,
he cannot even realise why i am so angry at his behaviour and why i called him names,as i have seen a man just like him ruin my sisters life, and i did not want him to ruin his cousins's life.
fair enough, i should'nt have swore at him, but he had to stoop to saying that about my sister.He show's lack of respect to women, least of all his wife, he performed his Nikah at the wedding, and then he goes and did what he did. Some people are beyond reasoning with.
kutti kamini mae tera khoon pee jaounga

[miss_kuti_kamini]

U didn't like it when I said your sister got what she deserved just the way I don't like being called names. I'm here for advice not to take or read abuse from sum1 I don't even know.
Like I say I've made a mistake and I need as much advice as possible in order to do the right thing for every1 here. The last thing I need is to hear abuse. I'm sorry for saying what I said about your sister


thank you

[miss_kuti_kamini]

kutti kamini mae tera khoon pee jaounga

:ugh:

[phishuff]

dracula ki mohabbat

[hakuna-matata]

dracula ki mohabbat

lol

[creatinekid]

Get blood work done on your wife, and tell her the likelihood of concieving a child with some sort of genetic disorder will be too great and therefore you dont want kids with her.

It should work out on its own.

[4u2nvqt]

marry them both,

[killeramit]

the answer is simple. just stay with the sexier one. everything else is just details. :D

[gorjuzkuri]

thats what I said earlier
Definitely, and its not easy to see instantly...but, with time you realize a lot of stuff...as have i. And, when i look back at it...i remember it being the only thing in the world that i wanted in the most [obsessive] manner, which led me to not see otherwise than what i wanted to see. Today, though when i think about it i realize what kind of wreck i wouldve put myself into. His situation is not one of those easy ones made...because i see that most of it has to do with emotions. It would also subsequently be wrong for him to stay with his wife and not have feelings for her. So, it is rather a mess. But, i mean...lesson learned...dont get involved before ending other ties. :] Btw, How are you?

[gorjuzkuri]

many thanks for that post gorjuzkuri,
he cannot even realise why i am so angry at his behaviour and why i called him names,as i have seen a man just like him ruin my sisters life, and i did not want him to ruin his cousins's life.
fair enough, i should'nt have swore at him, but he had to stoop to saying that about my sister.He show's lack of respect to women, least of all his wife, he performed his Nikah at the wedding, and then he goes and did what he did. Some people are beyond reasoning with.
Aww sweety, i know what you mean completely. Ive had a lot of things happen to people very close to me..and if i hear about someone doing the same...my blood literally starts boiling. I guess sometimes what we have seen others may have not gotten the chance to see...and, they dont realize how crucial it is and how much it affects us. Im very sorry about your sister...truly. And, may God bless her with her happiness that is rightfully hers. :]
Hope you are feeling better, yeh?

[~sweetthing~]

Fuck me the girl in the story looks exactly like the UK girl
Whoop Dee dooo!! :rolleyes: good for you!

[~sweetthing~]

I'm not looking for any sympathy U dumb fuck. If you read my post at the beginning you'll realise I need advice. Maybe U can't read
I don't care what you're looking for!

Dumb fuck!?! This is coming from a guy that thinks with his pants and not with his mind.

Your wife and UK girlfriend are too good for you!!! I hope they both leave you!

What you say won't matter anymore, you already cheated on your wife.

Curse and call me any names you want, it won't change the fact you're a cheater!!

[supremed]

I don't care what you're looking for!

Dumb fuck!?! This is coming from a guy that thinks with his pants and not with his mind.

Your wife and UK girlfriend are too good for you!!! I hope they both leave you!

What you say won't matter anymore, you already cheated on your wife.

Curse and call me any names you want, it won't change the fact you're a cheater!!
oh snapple

[~sweetthing~]

oh snapple
Yesss :D ?

[supremed]

Yesss :D ?
you told him where to go..and it was amazing...i think i need a cigarette now

[~sweetthing~]

you told him where to go..and it was amazing...i think i need a cigarette now
Forget the cigarettes, let's go hookah :cool:

[supremed]

Forget the cigarettes, let's go hookah :cool:
screw apple flavor...i want mix veg

[~sweetthing~]

screw apple flavor...i want mix veg
Ok then, let's go! :cool:

[Magpie2121]

Definitely, and its not easy to see instantly...but, with time you realize a lot of stuff...as have i. And, when i look back at it...i remember it being the only thing in the world that i wanted in the most [obsessive] manner, which led me to not see otherwise than what i wanted to see. Today, though when i think about it i realize what kind of wreck i wouldve put myself into. His situation is not one of those easy ones made...because i see that most of it has to do with emotions. It would also subsequently be wrong for him to stay with his wife and not have feelings for her. So, it is rather a mess. But, i mean...lesson learned...dont get involved before ending other ties. :] Btw, How are you?

I'm doing OK, thanks. Just been thinking a lot of things today. The girl from here says she's gonna leave the city and move away before my wife gets here as she can't bear the pain of knowing I'm going to be with her. She's been saying a lot of things such as that she cries every night before going to sleep and the thought of her doing this is killing me cos I really love her.
I'm seriously considering just leaving home and moving out as I know the girl from here won't be able to bear the thought of me living under the same roof as my wife. After all if she was in my position and her husband was coming to live with her then that thought would kill me too.
On the other side I know my wife is a really nice person and like I say she's always been very good to me and my family. Leaving her before she even comes here is gonna make her, my family and her family very very upset too. Even though I don't have feelings for my wife I know she doesn't deserve this.
I don't know what I was thinking when I got myself into this situation but I'm truly paying the price now

[supremed]

Ok then, let's go! :cool:
youre paying

[_true_definition]

Myfirst reaction would be, you plonker!!! but then everyone makes mistakes in life, its about learning from them and moving forward. u need to ask you a vital question...you say that you don't want to be in the marriage with your cousin right? did you sleep with her? if you did then i would say what i said earlier, plonker!!! if not, it shows you wanted to stay true to the girl you you met in the uk. thats a good sign i guess.

what is marriage anyway? to begin with its only a piece of paper...its nothing untill you build a relationship with your partner. you and your wife/cousin seem to have gone through the formalities but it seems like there is no communication to build the relationship yet?

sometimes in life we think we know what we want but then smackkk you realise when its too late...better late than never! sometimes mistakes need to be made in order to truly know what you want in life. in my opinion, follow your heart...fuck what family say, they're always gonna give their opinion, yapp yapping on about respect and all that!

so the question i leave you with is, what is more important? your family's so called "respect" or your own happiness? its red or blue pill time

[5jabi420]

When I was engaged to my wife, I used to call her every day for the first coupe of years or so. Eventually we drifted and the phone calls got less and less. For the last 5 years, I must have spoken to her about 5 times.
Anyways, I have to go now, thnx again for the comments


if you realized that you guys were already drifting apart, then why didn't you break it off? it really would've saved your cousin from the heart break...

[gorjuzkuri]

I'm doing OK, thanks. Just been thinking a lot of things today. The girl from here says she's gonna leave the city and move away before my wife gets here as she can't bear the pain of knowing I'm going to be with her. She's been saying a lot of things such as that she cries every night before going to sleep and the thought of her doing this is killing me cos I really love her.
I'm seriously considering just leaving home and moving out as I know the girl from here won't be able to bear the thought of me living under the same roof as my wife. After all if she was in my position and her husband was coming to live with her then that thought would kill me too.
On the other side I know my wife is a really nice person and like I say she's always been very good to me and my family. Leaving her before she even comes here is gonna make her, my family and her family very very upset too. Even though I don't have feelings for my wife I know she doesn't deserve this.
I don't know what I was thinking when I got myself into this situation but I'm truly paying the price now

Is there anyway you can get out of this relationship with your wife. Any way that you can talk to her and explain all the pros and cons. Cause, with the way you are thinking which is very emotionally unstable...you are gonna make the wrong decision guaranteed...and, at the end you are gonna just blame yourself and one of the two chicks...or maybe both. Come to perhaps an understanding...i mean the reason why im not pointing fingers at you...is that i know things happen...and people never walk a mile in other peoples shoes needless to say. I dont know how you got yourself into it...and, im sure that if you could go back and change this in your past you would. But, we cannot dwell upon that, rather, we should take the time and come up with a solution. The only thing i may oppose strongly is having a physical relationship with this other girl...im not too supportive of that. But, once again...i am not the one to judge you because nor am i God and nor has he put me in your shoes to feel what you may be feeling.

[uglyDuckling]

Is there anyway you can get out of this relationship with your wife. Any way that you can talk to her and explain all the pros and cons. Cause, with the way you are thinking which is very emotionally unstable...you are gonna make the wrong decision guaranteed...and, at the end you are gonna just blame yourself and one of the two chicks...or maybe both. Come to perhaps an understanding...i mean the reason why im not pointing fingers at you...is that i know things happen...and people never walk a mile in other peoples shoes needless to say. I dont know how you got yourself into it...and, im sure that if you could go back and change this in your past you would. But, we cannot dwell upon that, rather, we should take the time and come up with a solution. The only thing i may oppose strongly is having a physical relationship with this other girl...im not too supportive of that. But, once again...i am not the one to judge you because nor am i God and nor has he put me in your shoes to feel what you may be feeling.

How can you even suggest that? Do you realise how divorced women in Pakistan are treated? Do you realise that most of the time it's made out to be the woman's fault when it really isn't? She will be classified as a defective piece and she won't get a second chance towards a happy marriage because people in those countries consider divorced women as taboo. Even her family might taunt her. She will face the brunt of this man's mistakes. What for? This guy, who messed up, might find another sexy young lass but his wife won't get that chance. She totally does not deserve this.

And whatever I said about Pakistan's culture is purely based on what my pakistani friend told me because her brother was planning on leaving his wife even before she moved here.

[itismyusername]

How can you even suggest that? Do you realise how divorced women in Pakistan are treated? Do you realise that most of the time it's made out to be the woman's fault when it really isn't? She will be classified as a defective piece and she won't get a second chance towards a happy marriage because people in those countries consider divorced women as taboo. Even her family might taunt her. She will face the brunt of this man's mistakes. What for? This guy, who messed up, might find another sexy young lass but his wife won't get that chance. She totally does not deserve this.

And whatever I said about Pakistan's culture is purely based on what my pakistani friend told me because her brother was planning on leaving his wife even before she moved here.
well the divorced women taboo exists in India too not just in Pakistan.

[Z4K5T4R]

Bit like the film Barsaat with Bobby Deol, Bipasha Basu and Priyanka Chopra. He ended up being with his Wife Priyanka in the end, they were engaged since lil and she was supposed to marry him but he went to America and went off with Bipasha etc etc. You all get the jist.

Anyways, Threadmaker, I agree with Miss Kuti Kamini - Someone from the otherside of the story who has gone through and seen the pain that goes through the family, you have to understand being selfish isn't always the way to be! Maybe your wife needs that second chance fromy ou why don't you see how it goes as said by your family? Then make your decisions. A girl you've been on a date with twice and seems ever so obsessive may not be ''the one'' she sounds a bit to clingy to me and bet she will cause more problems being in your life than out of your life.

[miss_kuti_kamini]

Bit like the film Barsaat with Bobby Deol, Bipasha Basu and Priyanka Chopra. He ended up being with his Wife Priyanka in the end, they were engaged since lil and she was supposed to marry him but he went to America and went off with Bipasha etc etc. You all get the jist.

Anyways, Threadmaker, I agree with Miss Kuti Kamini - Someone from the otherside of the story who has gone through and seen the pain that goes through the family, you have to understand being selfish isn't always the way to be! Maybe your wife needs that second chance fromy ou why don't you see how it goes as said by your family? Then make your decisions. A girl you've been on a date with twice and seems ever so obsessive may not be ''the one'' she sounds a bit to clingy to me and bet she will cause more problems being in your life than out of your life.
:wavey:
i appreciate your way of thinking my love!

[Z4K5T4R]

:wavey:
i appreciate your way of thinking my love!


No problem. With people (myself included) it's easy to give advice but it isn't as easy to understand the advice given and to have known the pain it can cause with each decision chosen.

Hurt ONE girl or hurt SEVERAL members of the family?

[miss_kuti_kamini]

No problem. With people (myself included) it's easy to give advice but it isn't as easy to understand the advice given and to have known the pain it can cause with each decision chosen.

Hurt ONE girl or hurt SEVERAL members of the family?


EXACTLY.
in my familys experience, it caused indescribable heartache.
And it has like a ripple effect, on the whole family & relatives, esp with my sisters future, the stigma a divorced muslim girl holds, her future etc,

it just gets me so mad when i see others have such little respect & regard for marriage, its not a game

[Z4K5T4R]

EXACTLY.
in my familys experience, it caused indescribable heartache.
And it has like a ripple effect, on the whole family & relatives, esp with my sisters future, the stigma a divorced muslim girl holds, her future etc,

it just gets me so mad when i see others have such little respect & regard for marriage, its not a game


I know, but think of it this way atleast he was out of her life at an earlier stage before she had kids etc (or did she?) and sooner or later he probably would have been going out looking for some other Chic, if a guys mentality is set one way they won't change that. You just have to put it down to selfishness of the Man. When he needs someone one day he won't have anyone, as no matter how bad a family can be they will always be there but a Girl she can disappear at a blink of an eye. There are nice souls out there that I am sure will overlook the whole divorcee matter.

[miss_kuti_kamini]

I know, but think of it this way atleast he was out of her life at an earlier stage before she had kids etc (or did she?) and sooner or later he probably would have been going out looking for some other Chic, if a guys mentality is set one way they won't change that. You just have to put it down to selfishness of the Man. When he needs someone one day he won't have anyone, as no matter how bad a family can be they will always be there but a Girl she can disappear at a blink of an eye. There are nice souls out there that I am sure will overlook the whole divorcee matter.

no, thankfully, my sister didnt have any kids or anything like that with him, so that's a relief. Otherwise, that would have made things that much more difficult for her future.
I just hope that in his case, what goes around, comes around!!!

[--Tonks--]

Your family wants her to come to UK,and live with you for 6 months before you divorce her?
Oh please, thats just another shoot at making you live with her, and hope you fall in love with her, and decide to cancel the divorce.. so bollywood..

But yeah, you should stick to that cheapass bimbo that slept with you after 2 dates! you two deserve eachother. divorce your wife, she deserves a man. You obviously have proven that you're not one.

[pakilicious911]

Dude if you're chosing the UK girl over your cuz then just do it. what are you waiting around for? it doesnt seem like you want to stick around with your cuz even tho you went through with the marriage which was initially your fault. Dont ruin someone elses life because of how you feel. You should have been truthful with your wife as well about these things and maybe he would have agreed to call off the marriage?

[PRCIV]

cuzzins ftw :cheers: :dance: :Pelvic2::grouphug::buttsex:

[CorruptNightfall]

You're married...suck it up and make the marriage work.

[uglyDuckling]

well the divorced women taboo exists in India too not just in Pakistan.

I said pakistan because the said female in the marriage is Pakistani but if you want me to be politically correct then yes, your statement is not wrong.

[_MaStaMinD_]

do you know the family of the new girl you met?..she might just be playin you cause its probably a game for her to win over a guy who is already married.

[gorjuzkuri]

How can you even suggest that? Do you realise how divorced women in Pakistan are treated? Do you realise that most of the time it's made out to be the woman's fault when it really isn't? She will be classified as a defective piece and she won't get a second chance towards a happy marriage because people in those countries consider divorced women as taboo. Even her family might taunt her. She will face the brunt of this man's mistakes. What for? This guy, who messed up, might find another sexy young lass but his wife won't get that chance. She totally does not deserve this.

And whatever I said about Pakistan's culture is purely based on what my pakistani friend told me because her brother was planning on leaving his wife even before she moved here.

Ok...read my earlier posts please. i am not supporting this act in any manner. However, i would think that if he is gonna leave her in the end after using her for six months...i highly suggest that he find a way out of it now. Because, by then he will have created memories for her, brought her away from homeland, she will have tried as best as she could, and at that point there will be not point, possibility of a pregnancy too. If you read in my earlier posts i am very against what is going on...but, you have to realize the mistakes been made. And, as much as we all wish he could stick with his wife...hes debating about it. And, no woman deserves to be the " i guess shell work" type of girl. Although, no woman deserves whats happening to begin with in this situation. But, im trying to find a way that is not momentary and that can be beneficial in the long run. If you understand what im saying. I think he hasnt given his wife a second chance firstly, because he was ready to get engaged to her 9 years ago just as readily as he has fallen in love with this girl. It is only over time that his love for his wife has faded and is nearly "extinct." And, what he may think is true love with this new chick...may just be, that he has found a girl that can relate to him. And, ive seen that happen to so many men. im not bragging or anything but any guy i talk to for about 4 weeks MAX...and can relate to being my honest self...they seem to fall in love. As sad as it is...its probably the same for a chick...show some compassion, loyalty, and "realistic-ness" and bam...its considered love. All im trying to say in this whole BOOK that i just wrote as a response....i just hope that there is a way to get out of things before the life is completely fucked up when shes got 5 kids and hes still not in love with her.

[vgirl]

you made a committment.
your mistake was making that commitment too early, and not being able to follow through.

[icekreamgirl12]

:no:

[paki_guy786]

I truly love the girl from here but I don't have feelings for my wife


well why were you in a rush to get married that early.

[deek-sha]

I said pakistan because the said female in the marriage is Pakistani but if you want me to be politically correct then yes, your statement is not wrong.

:hug:

[illin]

lets see here, 17 + 9 = 26 = old enough to do whatever the fuck you want.

[nikefc7]

marry both problem solved.

[itismyusername]

how old is your wife and the other girl?

[Magpie2121]

No problem. With people (myself included) it's easy to give advice but it isn't as easy to understand the advice given and to have known the pain it can cause with each decision chosen.

Hurt ONE girl or hurt SEVERAL members of the family?

Well that's what it boils down to at the end of the day. Also, if I divorce my wife then I know it will be very, very difficult for her to re-marry in Pakistan and none of this is her fault, her life may be ruined.
I'm thinking about leaving the girl I love here as it will keep everyone but myself and the girl here happy. The only thing is that if things don't go well between me and my wife then I know the girl here will be gone and I know for a fact I'll never find another girl like her. I've never felt this way about anyone (except for when I got engaged to my wife at the age of 17, but maybe that was just a crush) and I believe in life you only find 1 true love. My wife deserves this chance and that's what my instinct keeps telling me although I've still not made any sort of decision. Call it indecisive or whatever but that's how I'm feeling

[Magpie2121]

do you know the family of the new girl you met?..she might just be playin you cause its probably a game for her to win over a guy who is already married.

Well that's another thing my family have been saying, but they're prob just saying that to put me off.
After all the girl here is in touch with me all the time and even when I was in Pakistan she was always calling me and she ran up a huge phone bill.
I asked her if she's truly serious about us and she got very angry saying she would never be in touch or call me if she wasn't serious and I could see she was genuinely upset at me questioning her.

[Magpie2121]

Ok...read my earlier posts please. i am not supporting this act in any manner. However, i would think that if he is gonna leave her in the end after using her for six months...i highly suggest that he find a way out of it now. Because, by then he will have created memories for her, brought her away from homeland, she will have tried as best as she could, and at that point there will be not point, possibility of a pregnancy too. If you read in my earlier posts i am very against what is going on...but, you have to realize the mistakes been made. And, as much as we all wish he could stick with his wife...hes debating about it. And, no woman deserves to be the " i guess shell work" type of girl. Although, no woman deserves whats happening to begin with in this situation. But, im trying to find a way that is not momentary and that can be beneficial in the long run. If you understand what im saying. I think he hasnt given his wife a second chance firstly, because he was ready to get engaged to her 9 years ago just as readily as he has fallen in love with this girl. It is only over time that his love for his wife has faded and is nearly "extinct." And, what he may think is true love with this new chick...may just be, that he has found a girl that can relate to him. And, ive seen that happen to so many men. im not bragging or anything but any guy i talk to for about 4 weeks MAX...and can relate to being my honest self...they seem to fall in love. As sad as it is...its probably the same for a chick...show some compassion, loyalty, and "realistic-ness" and bam...its considered love. All im trying to say in this whole BOOK that i just wrote as a response....i just hope that there is a way to get out of things before the life is completely fucked up when shes got 5 kids and hes still not in love with her.


If I'm to give my wife a chance then I've decided for many reasons I will not sleep with her for the first 2 years at least, regardless of how things are going within the first 6 months. Firstly, if she becomes pregnant and then things don't work then that's obviously going to cause huge problem. The UK girl here is obviously not happy with me giving my wife a chance as it will hurt her to think I'll be with her. Like I've said before, if she was in my situation and her husband was coming here then I'd be extremely upset considering how much I love her; the thought of another man being with her would drive me crazy.
But I guess it shows how much the UK girl loves me as she's now willing to accept that I'm going to be with my wife for 6 months to see how things go, purely for the sake of my family. I've also told the girl here not to wait for me and to just get on with her life, if she meets somebody else then fine, I'll just have to live with that if things don't work out with my wife but it would be totally unfair on the UK girl to allow her life to come to a standstill whilst I'm with my wife. Fuck me I love her so much

[Magpie2121]

how old is your wife and the other girl?

My wife is 26, I'm 28 and the girl here is 31 (although she gets asked to show her ID wherever she goes lol)

[candle23]

My wife is 26, I'm 28 and the girl here is 31 (although she gets asked to show her ID wherever she goes lol)

Go for the 31 year old =)

[desi_shawrty]

w/e happend to together till death do us apart

anyways umm everyone else said how silly you are for leaving your wife for a chick you just recently met. You seem to fall too quick too :no:

Onething i'll like to add is that it's pretty sad that you're staying with the girl so your family isn't insulted but you don't care about her life?
How selfish can you be man?

[Magpie2121]

w/e happend to together till death do us apart

anyways umm everyone else said how silly you are for leaving your wife for a chick you just recently met. You seem to fall too quick too :no:

Onething i'll like to add is that it's pretty sad that you're staying with the girl so your family isn't insulted but you don't care about her life?
How selfish can you be man?

Maybe if you read my posts properly then you'll understand that I do care for her life

[sarblohsinghz]

i didnt read that, but just follow ur heart, and 6th sense :cool:

[sarblohsinghz]

follow ur heart not ur dik ull be fine


exactly so stay with ur cousin :ugh:

[desi_shawrty]

Maybe if you read my posts properly then you'll understand that I do care for her life

Well you really do need to give this girl a chance and while you are you need to tell that other girl to get out of your life cause you're a married man now.

Just like you were so in love with this girl and i guess now she changed like you said... well what makes you think this chick wont either. You hardly know the girl but you're ready to marry her. Now that you are married i say stick to that girl and seriously give her a chance and try to make it work and don't get caught up with other chicks in that time. Things might work out so don't have a negative attitude towards this to start off with.

Also try putting your self in everyone else's shoes too.

[crayzee]

I've been engaged to this girl in Pakistan for 9 years and she's my first cousin. I agreed to get engaged to her and it was all my idea as I really liked her at the time, even though I had just turned 17. My parents weren't too keen on the idea but I insisted on the engagement.