relationship issue...

[idonknw]

alright so here we go,

what would you do...if you have a friend who you really liked at one point of time, and they were your first love, but things were not working out so you let go. You both decieded to go your own ways, but now...he's trying to come back to you...and tells you how much he misses you n etc. What would you do if you have always liked him...but because of all the 'pain' it seems as if nothing is left within you..'emotionally' :sarb: wut do you do? :neutral:

[buylill]

wrong site buddy

[idonknw]

wrong site buddy

lol i knw this aint the right site...but i thought ill give it a try n see what some smart ppl might think...and smart meaning the minority of rd's that are actually sensible :neutral:

[piñacolada<3]

been there done that
not worth ruining ur friendship over

[idonknw]

been there done that
not worth ruining ur friendship over

but isnt the friendship already ruined, if he doesnt see you as a friend only? and wants to be a in a relationship...but bcuz of the past...you dont know if you should date him or not... :sarb:

[BoO bOo]

Do you see him more than a friend? If not then there is no point in trying either because it will just end up ruining your friendship.

[~Angel Of Death~]

Keep walking on the road you took, and don't look back unless he has made significant change in himself or something that will make this time relationship better.

[buylill]

lol i knw this aint the right site...but i thought ill give it a try n see what some smart ppl might think...and smart meaning the minority of rd's that are actually sensible :neutral:


hmm alright let's see,
you like him, he likes you
but you have to decide if that factor takes precedence over the fact that there will most likely be difficulties and hardships in the future. You WILL go through issues again, bet on that. so whats more important? going throguh rough times cuz you like him and risk losing a grat friendship or deciding that its best if nothing comes out of the situation

[Just A Man]

alright so here we go,

what would you do...if you have a friend who you really liked at one point of time, and they were your first love, but things were not working out so you let go. You both decieded to go your own ways, but now...he's trying to come back to you...and tells you how much he misses you n etc. What would you do if you have always liked him...but because of all the 'pain' it seems as if nothing is left within you..'emotionally' :sarb: wut do you do? :neutral:


What was the reason it did not work out in first place? How long has it been since he is coming back to you?

[piñacolada<3]

but isnt the friendship already ruined, if he doesnt see you as a friend only? and wants to be a in a relationship...but bcuz of the past...you dont know if you should date him or not... :sarb:
if u are stern with him then he will get back on track
bc sometimes somebdy is better off as a friend than a bf
blve me i ruined a 4 yr old friendship in less than a month...take my advice its not worth it!!!

[idonknw]

Do you see him more than a friend? If not then there is no point in trying either because it will just end up ruining your friendship.

i think the friendship is pretty much ruined...to tell you honestly, i really loved him some time back...but been through too much so i decieded to let go...so i dont even know...

[BoO bOo]

i think the friendship is pretty much ruined...to tell you honestly, i really loved him some time back...but been through too much so i decieded to let go...so i dont even know...
Well in this case, i'd say go ahead. You never know what future holds and you should not hold yourself back to get happiness. If you believe its worth it then go for it.

[idonknw]

hmm alright let's see,
you like him, he likes you
but you have to decide if that factor takes precedence over the fact that there will most likely be difficulties and hardships in the future. You WILL go through issues again, bet on that. so whats more important? going throguh rough times cuz you like him and risk losing a grat friendship or deciding that its best if nothing comes out of the situation

yeah your right, and i dont want to go through hard times over again...i need to focus on other things in my life as well...but see there is no sense of friendship left anymore...he told me that he really liked me and he'll do anything to come back to me...and im left with confusion.

[idonknw]

What was the reason it did not work out in first place? How long has it been since he is coming back to you?

he has been trying to come back to me for the past couple of months...it didnt work out cuz he wasnt ready for a relationship at that point, but now he tells me that he wants to be completely committed :sarb: so i don even knw...

[idonknw]

Well in this case, i'd say go ahead. You never know what future holds and you should not hold yourself back to get happiness. If you believe its worth it then go for it.

honestly, a part of me tells me to go for it and yeah i want to see a good future with this...but then bcuz of the past, a part of me tells me to stay away..very difficult situation, lol...

[Just A Man]

he has been trying to come back to me for the past couple of months...it didnt work out cuz he wasnt ready for a relationship at that point, but now he tells me that he wants to be completely committed :sarb: so i don even knw...

So he had his own reasons. Well if he wants to be committed then what are you waiting for?

[idonknw]

So he had his own reasons. Well if he wants to be committed then what are you waiting for?

it would turn out to be long distance cuz we went to the same uni...but now he's moving...and despite that, he is wanting this relationship..but again cuz of the things in the past, and then long distance i dunno if i can trust him...and i dont want to waste time either right...where i would put in my best, but on the other side you never knw whats happenin...

[buylill]

yeah your right, and i dont want to go through hard times over again...i need to focus on other things in my life as well...but see there is no sense of friendship left anymore...he told me that he really liked me and he'll do anything to come back to me...and im left with confusion.


tell him straight up nothings gonna happen between u two
if he likes your company hell stay friends with you, if not, then hellbe gay and not talk to you

guys arent worth it

[BoO bOo]

honestly, a part of me tells me to go for it and yeah i want to see a good future with this...but then bcuz of the past, a part of me tells me to stay away..very difficult situation, lol...
You cant let your past overcome your future. Just make it better this time with better choices. Maybe clearing out things before getting into a relationship.

[Just A Man]

it would turn out to be long distance cuz we went to the same uni...but now he's moving...and despite that, he is wanting this relationship..but again cuz of the things in the past, and then long distance i dunno if i can trust him...and i dont want to waste time either right...where i would put in my best, but on the other side you never knw whats happenin...

How far is the distance?

[idonknw]

tell him straight up nothings gonna happen between u two
if he likes your company hell stay friends with you, if not, then hellbe gay and not talk to you

guys arent worth it

i do agree with you :wavey: tnx! i knw, i dont even wanna be a in relationship at this point of time...but then sometimes despite trying sometimes things juss come back to you...but yeah ur right.

[buylill]

i do agree with you :wavey: tnx! i knw, i dont even wanna be a in relationship at this point of time...but then sometimes despite trying sometimes things juss come back to you...but yeah ur right.


:drdodgy:

[idonknw]

How far is the distance?

if he moved, he would be 4 hours away from my place...

[idonknw]

You cant let your past overcome your future. Just make it better this time with better choices. Maybe clearing out things before getting into a relationship.

your right, and i guess ppl mature up every year as well right...so maybe things could go way better...and yes clearing up is def the way to go before getting into the relationship...tnx boo boo! :wavey: :grouphug:

[Just A Man]

if he moved, he would be 4 hours away from my place...

hmmmm

thats like Houston To Dallas.

how old are both of you?
both have vehicles?
if both parties are serious, I say go for it.
Any of you going to make visits?

[buylill]

just_a_man, dude enough with questions, you dont need to know her history just to give simple advice.

[Just A Man]

from Fresno eh
what city is he in?

I grew up in San Jose.

[Kavita]

alright so here we go,

what would you do...if you have a friend who you really liked at one point of time, and they were your first love, but things were not working out so you let go. You both decieded to go your own ways, but now...he's trying to come back to you...and tells you how much he misses you n etc. What would you do if you have always liked him...but because of all the 'pain' it seems as if nothing is left within you..'emotionally' :sarb: wut do you do? :neutral:

This is more reliable than RD

Just ask the magic 8 ball what to do.

http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2059/1881373220_372e700e78.jpg?v=0

[Just A Man]

just_a_man, dude enough with questions, you dont need to know herhistor just to give simple advice.

open ended probing questions.

[idonknw]

hmmmm

thats like Houston To Dallas.

how old are both of you?
both have vehicles?
if both parties are serious, I say go for it.
Any of you going to make visits?

lolz.. im 19 and he's 21...
yeah we both have cars...i just dont know if both parties are serious, i mean in my part i would def be serious, and would take the relationship in a very serious n honest way...but juss dont know about him...maybe just afraid of being hurt again...when i think about this...i juss say juss leave it n continue with things that are already going on...like im busy too with college.

[BoO bOo]

your right, and i guess ppl mature up every year as well right...so maybe things could go way better...and yes clearing up is def the way to go before getting into the relationship...tnx boo boo! :wavey: :grouphug:
exactly. Well i hope things workout for you. :hug:

[idonknw]

just_a_man, dude enough with questions, you dont need to know her history just to give simple advice.

lolz... :lulz:

[Just A Man]

lolz.. im 19 and he's 21...
yeah we both have cars...i just dont know if both parties are serious, i mean in my part i would def be serious, and would take the relationship in a very serious n honest way...but juss dont know about him...maybe just afraid of being hurt again...when i think about this...i juss say juss leave it n continue with things that are already going on...like im busy too with college.


lol..young people.

Well I have been in your situation when I was your age. What the heck, go for it. You are young. Only if both are serious though. If I had the mindset of today when I was your age. It would be a big no. But life is not perfect.

[idonknw]

lol..young people.

Well I have been in your situation when I was your age. What the heck, go for it. You are young. Only if both are serious though. If I had the mindset of today when I was your age. It would be a big no. But life is not perfect.

lolz...ok..i dunno what im gonna decide on yet...but tnx! :wavey:

[idonknw]

This is more reliable than RD

Just ask the magic 8 ball what to do.

http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2059/1881373220_372e700e78.jpg?v=0

:rofl: aite, ill consider your sources

[~JeN~]

Were you guys talking after your breakup? Or did you guys completely lose contact?

[idonknw]

Were you guys talking after your breakup? Or did you guys completely lose contact?

we talked for awhile, but then i stopped cuz it just hurt me more and i knew i had to move on....but then after a while he came back to me...where i had thought that everything is over...for good...

[~JeN~]

I'm sorry if I sound like a real skeptic as I say this but are you sure he's back because he wants you or is it because he's lonely? Maybe he just wants to be part of someone's life again? I've had friends go through similar situations and that's why you really need to decide first of all, whether you should give him a chance again. And then, you need to sit down with him and figure out what his real intentions are. Is he truly there because he misses you and wants to work things out?

[idonknw]

I'm sorry if I sound like a real skeptic as I say this but are you sure he's back because he wants you or is it because he's lonely? Maybe he just wants to be part of someone's life again? I've had friends go through similar situations and that's why you really need to decide first of all, whether you should give him a chance again. And then, you need to sit down with him and figure out what his real intentions are. Is he truly there because he misses you and wants to work things out?

no, i know exactly what you mean...and i was concerned and thought about that too...so i kept ignoring him actually...but then he started calling me and he wanted to hang out and would also randomly ask about my opinions and thoughts about things...and he told me that he wants to see a 'future' with me..and thats when i didnt know what to do or say...

[~JeN~]

Well since you didn't really know what to say... you were taken aback by it that's for sure. You weren't able to say no but you didn't say yes to it either. In this case, it just would seem to be better to start off as friends again and see how you feel through that. Just take it slow

[idonknw]

Well since you didn't really know what to say... you were taken aback by it that's for sure. You weren't able to say no but you didn't say yes to it either. In this case, it just would seem to be better to start off as friends again and see how you feel through that. Just take it slow

yeah, exactly thats what im tryin to do, tnx! :wavey:

[idonknw]

anyways, tnx for the advice everyone! :D g'nite ya'll :wavey: