Finding muslim girls

[jimbo123]

Okay I'm going to graduate soon, after that hopefully I'll work for a few years and then get married. I'd like to get married as soon as possible.

Problem is though I don't want to rely on my parents to find me a nice girl. I have no problem with them arranging the marriage afterwards. It's just that there's too much pressure and if I say no I'll hurt the other family and the girl.

I'm just curious what Islamic options there are if I want to find a nice, Muslim girl myself. Also, if you're in a very public place or are with lots of friends, are you allowed to go on a date with someone?

Appreciate the help!

[zai_alam]

Do what everyone else does. Go back to your desi homeland and kidnap the one you fancy.

Don't you know anyone from your uni/college/workplace that you're interested in?

Dating is not really allowed because it can easily lead to hanky-panky.

[jimbo123]

There's a low concentration of girls on my course. I have no problems talking to girls, but I just don't know how to get the ball rolling without making it seem obvious I'm attracted to the girl. Most girls I've met through working on group exercises. I'm not very sociable, lol.

>> Do what everyone else does. Go back to your desi homeland and kidnap the one you fancy.

I only speak English well but you know what, you just gave me an idea. Weddings! High concentration of muslim girls, I'll just point to the one I want!

>> Dating is not really allowed because it can easily lead to hanky-panky.

I think they say it's allowed if you've got a family member present. Just wondering if it's allowed with friends present, there's obviously people out there that doesn't have any family.

[*BabyGirl*]

There's a low concentration of girls on my course. I have no problems talking to girls, but I just don't know how to get the ball rolling without making it seem obvious I'm attracted to the girl. Most girls I've met through working on group exercises. I'm not very sociable, lol.



If you like a girl, why wouldn't you want her to know you find her attractive? :rolleyes:

[zai_alam]

There's a low concentration of girls on my course. I have no problems talking to girls, but I just don't know how to get the ball rolling without making it seem obvious I'm attracted to the girl. Most girls I've met through working on group exercises. I'm not very sociable, lol.

>> Do what everyone else does. Go back to your desi homeland and kidnap the one you fancy.

I only speak English well but you know what, you just gave me an idea. Weddings! High concentration of muslim girls, I'll just point to the one I want!

>> Dating is not really allowed because it can easily lead to hanky-panky.

I think they say it's allowed if you've got a family member present. Just wondering if it's allowed with friends present, there's obviously people out there that doesn't have any family.

Wedding IS a good place for wifey hunting.
http://www.rifle-scopes.tv/images/binoculars/nikon-birding.jpg


If you want to get to know someone, then you need to have family or a trusted and sensible group of friends present.

[zai_alam]

If you like a girl, why wouldn't you want her to know you find her attractive? :rolleyes:

exactly.

but i suspect he's unsure of how to make an approach. am i right?

[Ash_s2002]

If you like a girl, why wouldn't you want her to know you find her attractive? :rolleyes:
good point >>> .

[jimbo123]

>> but i suspect he's unsure of how to make an approach. am i right?

Something like that. I don't want to come across as sleazy I've seen pretty girls get approached by strangers and they just look uncomfortable and annoyed with a face that says 'Yes I look good now leave me alone'.

[HeAvYmAcHiNeGuN]

ahhhh i would advice u to leave things to ALLAH

[zai_alam]

>> but i suspect he's unsure of how to make an approach. am i right?

Something like that. I don't want to come across as sleazy I've seen pretty girls get approached by strangers and they just look uncomfortable and annoyed with a face that says 'Yes I look good now leave me alone'.

You'll need advise from one of the female members on RD forums for this one. Make a thread.

I'm engaged (gonna get married within 2 years), but all I ever used to do was tease and take the piss out of my fiancee when I first started to get to know her. I still do. Lord knows why she likes me :-s

:lol:

I think there just needs to be some sort of chemistry between two people for things to work.

[KhanNoonienSingh]

Okay I'm going to graduate soon, after that hopefully I'll work for a few years and then get married. I'd like to get married as soon as possible.

Problem is though I don't want to rely on my parents to find me a nice girl. I have no problem with them arranging the marriage afterwards. It's just that there's too much pressure and if I say no I'll hurt the other family and the girl.

I'm just curious what Islamic options there are if I want to find a nice, Muslim girl myself. Also, if you're in a very public place or are with lots of friends, are you allowed to go on a date with someone?

Appreciate the help!
this is teh new world. we're an empowered civilization, etc. etc.

let them find you.

but since they're likely not looking for you, get a backup plan. like a hobby.

might i suggest something very satisfying with great risk to life, since you won't need a lot of that expected lifespan anymore.

[paki_Faz]

Wedding IS a good place for wifey hunting.
http://www.rifle-scopes.tv/images/binoculars/nikon-birding.jpg


If you want to get to know someone, then you need to have family or a trusted and sensible group of friends present.

:werd:

[paki_Faz]

zai givin 1st hand experience?

[*BabyGirl*]

>> but i suspect he's unsure of how to make an approach. am i right?

Something like that. I don't want to come across as sleazy I've seen pretty girls get approached by strangers and they just look uncomfortable and annoyed with a face that says 'Yes I look good now leave me alone'.

yes but they're only likely to say that if they don't like what they see. I guess it is awkward approaching stranger girls, but if you talk to a cousin's friend or a friend's friend etc.. I personally think they would respond differently, especially if they're interested in getting to know you.

anyway my point of view- don't go looking for love, let it come to you when the time is right. =)

[jimbo123]

Hmm I suppose I could put more of an effort with friend's friend and cousin's friend.

>> but since they're likely not looking for you, get a backup plan. like a hobby.

I'm like buried treasure, lol joke! Once I work full time (please let that be soon) I probably won't have time for new hobbies though I do obsessively watch movies, play games, some light reading, play pool. I workout but I don't like sports. Do you mean hobbies where I meet new people?

[Zuls]

Wel i've completed my masters...setup my own business....but i left this girl hnting thing on mum...not taking this risk on my own....so where ever when ever she says........

[zai_alam]

Wel i've completed my masters...setup my own business....but i left this girl hnting thing on mum...not taking this risk on my own....so where ever when ever she says........

What if the girl your mummy finds for you turns out to be a total cow (after you get married)?

[M.A.C]

I saw a girl at an engagement party recently that i really fancied, but couldn't approach her cos too many people were present,

The wedding idea is great, but its not always possible to make a move cos its almost impossible to get a private moment with someone at a big function.

Looking forward to seeing her again in 4 months at the wedding when hopefully I might get a chance to make a move.

[M.A.C]

What if the girl your mummy finds for you turns out to be a total cow (after you get married)?
try again?

muslims get 4 chances to find the one

[jimbo123]

I saw a girl at an engagement party recently that i really fancied, but couldn't approach her cos too many people were present,

The wedding idea is great, but its not always possible to make a move cos its almost impossible to get a private moment with someone at a big function.

Looking forward to seeing her again in 4 months at the wedding when hopefully I might get a chance to make a move.
True it's difficult to make a big impression especially if she's in a group.

I was thinking more along the lines of:

i) Find the lass you want
ii) Work out if she's single
iii) Find out who she is
iv) Find out who her parents are
v) Tell your mum or dad to arrange a few meetings

[PakPlaya69]

I saw a girl at an engagement party recently that i really fancied, but couldn't approach her cos too many people were present,

The wedding idea is great, but its not always possible to make a move cos its almost impossible to get a private moment with someone at a big function.

Looking forward to seeing her again in 4 months at the wedding when hopefully I might get a chance to make a move.


Thats long period and there is a good chance she will be done by then , i would rather use me connections and somehow get her number if not work out where she works and stuff and somehow cross her path , make my move.

[Zuls]

What if the girl your mummy finds for you turns out to be a total cow (after you get married)?

Wel the only person i trust in this world is my mum...no one knows kids better then own mum......so why shuld't i trust her...she been giving me guidance all my life and i'll return the favor by asking her to select the right person for me with blind trust...

[Zuls]

try again?

muslims get 4 chances to find the one


wel its gud u mention abut 4...i heard lot of people talking abut this...but they only tell u the half things...if u see the responsibilities which comes with it then u'll knw that by any chance no one can do it...just for example if u giv one grain of rice to ur one wife more then 2nd then u r accountable to God...and this is just a starter...

2nd my parents had arrange and i never seen a coupke as happy as them so why shuld't i trust arrange for me....where as i seen countless of luv marrages going down the drain both in family and outside

[TheLoneAvenger]

Problem is though I don't want to rely on my parents to find me a nice girl. I have no problem with them arranging the marriage afterwards. It's just that there's too much pressure and if I say no I'll hurt the other family and the girl.



It really doesn't work that way, in terms of hurting the other family. Unless some girl is really pining for you or vice versa, people aren't emotionally involved in the early stages, thus there really isn't much to get "hurt" over.

Having indirectly experienced the process, it's fairly painless to both parties.

If you're interested in finding a Muslim girl on your own though, best chance is going to your school's Muslim Student Assoc. or club or some other organization geared toward Pakis/Indians/Arabs etc.

[jimbo123]

If you're interested in finding a Muslim girl on your own though, best chance is going to your school's Muslim Student Assoc. or club or some other organization geared toward Pakis/Indians/Arabs etc.
Apart from the student ones, do you know of any in particular, in London that is?

[TheLoneAvenger]

Apart from the student ones, do you know of any in particular, in London that is?

Sorry, not from that neck of the woods.

You should just use friends and family to help point you in the right direction.

It can be tough finding a decent girl nowadays, even with help from your family.

[Sphinx7]

Okay I'm going to graduate soon, after that hopefully I'll work for a few years and then get married. I'd like to get married as soon as possible.

Problem is though I don't want to rely on my parents to find me a nice girl. I have no problem with them arranging the marriage afterwards. It's just that there's too much pressure and if I say no I'll hurt the other family and the girl.

I'm just curious what Islamic options there are if I want to find a nice, Muslim girl myself. Also, if you're in a very public place or are with lots of friends, are you allowed to go on a date with someone?

Appreciate the help!


go back 2 your homeland and get married. Thats the best thing 4 you to do. Here the girls are into play and games. Girls here arent serious and they cant maintain a house.

Dating here will just waste your time while having your feelings toyed with.

salaam.

[soladylike]

Go to Islamic Conventions.

It's the hotbed for finding spouses.

[BadFingerBoogie]

Go to Islamic Conventions.

It's the hotbed for finding spouses.

that's so fucking wrong.

[shamel_ki_jaan]

1) this is not a site for u to search for "the one"
2) try "naseeb.com"...many ppl got married off of that site
3) "shaadi.com"
or
4) just do ur thing and tell ur parents you're not ready to get married yet...

how old are u btw?

[soladylike]

that's so fucking wrong.

Oh totally.
Just at last year's ISNA convention 6 girls got knocked up.

Such haraam under the banner of Islam :(

:mad:

[TheLoneAvenger]

Oh totally.
Just at last year's ISNA convention 6 girls got knocked up.

Such haraam under the banner of Islam :(

:mad:

That's some impressive fornicating.

And no birth control to boot.

[*1001Nights*]

theres a law office right down the street from my masjid....he also does hookups on the DL :lol:

[*1001Nights*]

Oh totally.
Just at last year's ISNA convention 6 girls got knocked up.

Such haraam under the banner of Islam :(

:mad:
are you for real???.....lol i was helping out a booth at isna convention....omgg u shud hav heard some of the pic up lines guys used....suprisingly tho the girls were worse :p

[jimbo123]

lol, I was thinking it doesn't seem to right to pick people up at Islamic Conventions. I guess if you're with a member of your family and they are with theirs you are allowed to socialize.

@shamel_ki_jaan I'm 20. I was aware of shaadi but not naseeb, so ta for that.

[BadFingerBoogie]

Oh totally.
Just at last year's ISNA convention 6 girls got knocked up.

Such haraam under the banner of Islam :(

:mad:

stfu

you're joking me

are you kidding

:ugh:

:no:

[soladylike]

stfu

you're joking me

are you kidding

:ugh:

:no:

No, I'm not.
ISNA was very worried that something like that had occurred. The volunteers have become much more strict at all the Islamic Conventions now. No one wants that happening during an Islamic event and least of all, not under their organization's name.

[jihadthisfilth]

stfu

you're joking me

are you kidding

:ugh:

:no:
hahaha dude. Muslim bitches are some of the loosest ones. Living the way they do builds up sexual frustration and some just cannot control it.

[BadFingerBoogie]

No, I'm not.
ISNA was very worried that something like that had occurred. The volunteers have become much more strict at all the Islamic Conventions now. No one wants that happening during an Islamic event and least of all, not under their organization's name.

where's the proof -- how do you know?

hahaha dude. Muslim bitches are some of the loosest ones. Living the way they do builds up sexual frustration and some just cannot control it.

don't generalize muslim girls
:ashamed:

i hvae faith in the good ones out there, notthe sluts.

[jimbo123]

yeah, not good to generalize too much!

People (especially in the west) get married quite late nowadays. I suppose it takes a long time to finish education (I'm still doing mine) and become a grown up but if you get married early you can lose some of that sexual frustration build-up. Islamically that's one of the reasons you should get married ASAP after puberty.

I think my grandad got married at the age of 16 or 17 and he's got a family of 10.

BTW I googled about that ISNA convention knockup thingy but nothing came up. They can't have kept something like that hush-hush. Do you have a link to an article or something?

[jigga man23]

You wanna find deenee girls, not all muslim girls are saintz...

[jimbo123]

You wanna find deenee girls, not all muslim girls are saintz...
What's deenee?

[TheLoneAvenger]

BTW I googled about that ISNA convention knockup thingy but nothing came up. They can't have kept something like that hush-hush. Do you have a link to an article or something?

Yeah, I'm a little skeptical of the 6 pregnancy claim too.

I'm not saying it couldn't happen, but just seems high, and although I haven't been to the conference, none of my friends ever mentioned anything like this.

[TheLoneAvenger]

What's deenee?

Slang for religious.

[jimbo123]

Slang for religious.
Ohhhhh. Well ideally she would be religious, with good looks and good, interesting character traits. That's asking too much now isn't it? If she is religious she's probably got most of the character traits I'm looking for.

[soladylike]

where's the proof -- how do you know?



They're not going to announce something like this in a well written article.
The volunteers were gathered and told not to be so lax. Some of my friends were part of the volunteers.
The screening process for volunteers at these conventions has become more thorough. They need to have a proper resume and go through interviews now whereas before you just got in if your MSA was volunteering or if you just wanted to volunteer. Now they want "credentials".

[soladylike]

BTW I googled about that ISNA convention knockup thingy but nothing came up. They can't have kept something like that hush-hush. Do you have a link to an article or something?

Do you honestly think they will publicize something like this? Something that puts them in a bad light?
If you were the head of an Islamic organization would you go around broadcasting how at one of your events, something of this caliber took place under your watch?
Think logically. Even Muslim parents hesitate to admit that their children picked each other as their spouses instead of settling for an arranged marriage.

[BadFingerBoogie]

i don't know dear -- i don't buy it i need proof.

[zai_alam]

go back 2 your homeland and get married. Thats the best thing 4 you to do. Here the girls are into play and games. Girls here arent serious and they cant maintain a house.

Dating here will just waste your time while having your feelings toyed with.

salaam.
That's so true.

The trick is to just not let anyone know. ;)
Sluts are sluts. Most so called ''good girls'' are just sluts who get away with it :kekeke:

[gammagoblin]

I just came from "home"

girls there are much much worse than what you expect. That whole culture is mostly gone.. its horrible

[TheLoneAvenger]

I just came from "home"

girls there are much much worse than what you expect. That whole culture is mostly gone.. its horrible

I agree with this. Going back to Pakistan or India is no guarantee of anything.

I had a friend go back to Pakistan for a friend's wedding recently and he told me stories of drug use, alcohol use, and even prostitution being fairly common.

I guess I'm naive but damn are times changing.

[Love_Baby]

Okay I'm going to graduate soon, after that hopefully I'll work for a few years and then get married. I'd like to get married as soon as possible.

Problem is though I don't want to rely on my parents to find me a nice girl. I have no problem with them arranging the marriage afterwards. It's just that there's too much pressure and if I say no I'll hurt the other family and the girl.

I'm just curious what Islamic options there are if I want to find a nice, Muslim girl myself. Also, if you're in a very public place or are with lots of friends, are you allowed to go on a date with someone?

Appreciate the help!

holy crap get out of ur room n off ur computer n be more outgoing

no wonder desi marriages are so lifeless n suppressed these dayz :rolleyes:

[LABalla]

no dating in Islam ganday bachay even if the whole RD is hangin with you.

Why get married man.....just sleep around with all the wonderful lil sluts this great country has to offer.

[SarcasmicBengali]

There's a low concentration of girls on my course. I have no problems talking to girls, but I just don't know how to get the ball rolling without making it seem obvious I'm attracted to the girl. Most girls I've met through working on group exercises. I'm not very sociable, lol.

>> Do what everyone else does. Go back to your desi homeland and kidnap the one you fancy.

I only speak English well but you know what, you just gave me an idea. Weddings! High concentration of muslim girls, I'll just point to the one I want!

>> Dating is not really allowed because it can easily lead to hanky-panky.

I think they say it's allowed if you've got a family member present. Just wondering if it's allowed with friends present, there's obviously people out there that doesn't have any family.

someone on RD actualy told me once during an arguement that 'dating' is allowed if you have a chaperon basicaly...

not 100% sure bout that tho...
i doubt ur friends count as chaperons cuz they can be ... gotten rid of... if you want...

[SarcasmicBengali]

Lurk outside your local mosque.

:rofl:

you'd be surprised how often that works... :|
i know ppl that met at mandirs during diwali/poojas ... :no:

[SarcasmicBengali]

True it's difficult to make a big impression especially if she's in a group.

I was thinking more along the lines of:

i) Find the lass you want
ii) Work out if she's single
iii) Find out who she is
iv) Find out who her parents are
v) Tell your mum or dad to arrange a few meetings

listen man... its not so complicated these days...

you can just talk to ur rents, and draw a line w/ em that if they got anyone in mind... they'll just introduce you two... and leave it at that.
that way you and the girl can meet up, talk, do watever...
and both of you know exactly where it all may lead... so there's no awkward-ness...
then if its a yes or no... u just go back to rents and they do the rest...

its done with supervision but not like your parents meet and you two go to the next room and have 5 mins to decide if u like each other or not... :rolleyes:

[T.Dimera]

i'm getting to the point where hope is fading away...i am a lost cause, a lone wolf....a walking diaster...ok i'm off to spend my $$ on stupid things

[yo2344]

I love ISNA. Three :dance3: yrs ago Hyatt hotel held a club thing at night downstairs with DJ and everything. The whole place was packed. O my, o my it was wild. One thing I noticed that it got a little stricter. Now they have speeches for the young crowd late at night with good speakers.

btw go to facebook and search in groups

"club isna"


They took away all the pictures from three years ago but lets just say that was the place to be for hookups.

[jimbo123]

holy crap get out of ur room n off ur computer n be more outgoing

no wonder desi marriages are so lifeless n suppressed these dayz :rolleyes:
:squint:

[jimbo123]

someone on RD actualy told me once during an arguement that 'dating' is allowed if you have a chaperon basicaly...

not 100% sure bout that tho...
i doubt ur friends count as chaperons cuz they can be ... gotten rid of... if you want...
Yeah it is allowed if you're with family, probably not friends though... unless they are with your family.

[jimbo123]

listen man... its not so complicated these days...

you can just talk to ur rents, and draw a line w/ em that if they got anyone in mind... they'll just introduce you two... and leave it at that.
that way you and the girl can meet up, talk, do watever...
and both of you know exactly where it all may lead... so there's no awkward-ness...
then if its a yes or no... u just go back to rents and they do the rest...

its done with supervision but not like your parents meet and you two go to the next room and have 5 mins to decide if u like each other or not... :rolleyes:
yeah I know my mum won't force me to make a decision straight away but she will want to know about the progress and she wouldn't approve us going on unsupervised dates.

Btw that was the same thing as what I said...

[jimbo123]

I love ISNA. Three :dance3: yrs ago Hyatt hotel held a club thing at night downstairs with DJ and everything. The whole place was packed. O my, o my it was wild. One thing I noticed that it got a little stricter. Now they have speeches for the young crowd late at night with good speakers.

btw go to facebook and search in groups

"club isna"


They took away all the pictures from three years ago but lets just say that was the place to be for hookups.
thanks for the advice!

[LVibe]

I love the hypocrisy here. It just tickles me.

You people(the majority of you, anyway) go around all over the world, club, drink, and otherwise do evil things. You then talk about how India/Pakistan doesn't have these things, and put down both countries. You tell your friends/relatives in India/Pakistan how liberal and great the country you reside in is.

THEN, when it comes time for YOU to get married, suddenly, everything about India/Pakistan becomes appealing. You suddenly don't need a girl who can wear a miniskirt, but one that can cook and be a good mother for your children. Once you find out that India/Pakistan finally became the country you said it wasn't, you're disappointed.

I'm curious to know, how many of you have had a girl you were going to marry ask YOU if you've had sex/drink/smoke/do drugs, and then rejected YOU for it?

[htownzdevil]

I love ISNA. Three :dance3: yrs ago Hyatt hotel held a club thing at night downstairs with DJ and everything. The whole place was packed. O my, o my it was wild. One thing I noticed that it got a little stricter. Now they have speeches for the young crowd late at night with good speakers.

btw go to facebook and search in groups

"club isna"


They took away all the pictures from three years ago but lets just say that was the place to be for hookups.


umm thats not something to be proud of?

whether u went with the intent to go to "club isna" or you went with a good mindset but ended up going clubbing is bad either way you put it

and yes a lot of the younger generation go there just to get away from the rents and have fun without parental supervision. I hate people like that. Why do they use religion as an excuse to go fuck around seriously disturbs me.

and yes ppl actually fcuk there.. my friends went last year but i ended up not going.. i actually wanted to go to the conferences and listen to the speakers everyone else went because RDB was in town the same weekend as ISNA. how convenient :rolleyes: theres this girl i kn0w shes's 16 and her bf is 17. they were having sex in the bedroom, and mind you everyone rooms together when they go to isNa.. they were in the bed fuckin when everyone came thru the door like a group of like 10-15 and caught them having sex.. my friends were like man i saw her co0ch and i saw his ass.. and all this shit and they were clowning on them.. they have no sharam.. she didnt even cover up when they came into the room.. I was on the fone with my friend when all of this crap happened..

o0o and about meeting a girl... i would suggest some activity at school thats desii oriented like psa (pakistan/indian/arab student association) or something..

weddings are good to0 but u really dont have an opportunity to talk with a million aunties and uncles around..

but dont stress over it.. youll find someone when you least expect it. :D

[htownzdevil]

I love the hypocrisy here. It just tickles me.

You people(the majority of you, anyway) go around all over the world, club, drink, and otherwise do evil things. You then talk about how India/Pakistan doesn't have these things, and put down both countries. You tell your friends/relatives in India/Pakistan how liberal and great the country you reside in is.

THEN, when it comes time for YOU to get married, suddenly, everything about India/Pakistan becomes appealing. You suddenly don't need a girl who can wear a miniskirt, but one that can cook and be a good mother for your children. Once you find out that India/Pakistan finally became the country you said it wasn't, you're disappointed.

I'm curious to know, how many of you have had a girl you were going to marry ask YOU if you've had sex/drink/smoke/do drugs, and then rejected YOU for it?

I agree with you.. but its kinda funny cuz now their stuck.. they must now pick the lesser of two evils, no? lol

I know that theyre are some really good girls and bad girls no matter where you go in the world.. not everyone is fucked up..

[zai_alam]

umm thats not something to be proud of?

whether u went with the intent to go to "club isna" or you went with a good mindset but ended up going clubbing is bad either way you put it

and yes a lot of the younger generation go there just to get away from the rents and have fun without parental supervision. I hate people like that. Why do they use religion as an excuse to go fuck around seriously disturbs me.

and yes ppl actually fcuk there.. my friends went last year but i ended up not going.. i actually wanted to go to the conferences and listen to the speakers everyone else went because RDB was in town the same weekend as ISNA. how convenient :rolleyes: theres this girl i kn0w shes's 16 and her bf is 17. they were having sex in the bedroom, and mind you everyone rooms together when they go to isNa.. they were in the bed fuckin when everyone came thru the door like a group of like 10-15 and caught them having sex.. my friends were like man i saw her co0ch and i saw his ass.. and all this shit and they were clowning on them.. they have no sharam.. she didnt even cover up when they came into the room.. I was on the fone with my friend when all of this crap happened..

o0o and about meeting a girl... i would suggest some activity at school thats desii oriented like psa (pakistan/indian/arab student association) or something..

weddings are good to0 but u really dont have an opportunity to talk with a million aunties and uncles around..

but dont stress over it.. youll find someone when you least expect it. :D

:werd:

That's what happened to me.

[LVibe]

I agree with you.. but its kinda funny cuz now their stuck.. they must now pick the lesser of two evils, no? lol

I know that theyre are some really good girls and bad girls no matter where you go in the world.. not everyone is fucked up..

Lesser of two evils? How much more sexist can you people get?

I personally applaud any girl with enough intelligence to reject the lot of you.

[zaph69]

As long as you aren't alone with a girl, it should be fine to meet them and get to know them. No hanky panky okay yaar? The best thing I can say is to build friendships. Just build friendships in general, widen the social circle because that leads to a higher volume of new acquaintances - and acquaintances can hook you up with nice Muslim girls!

Work on yourself and your people skills and enjoy socializing, then start thinking of marriage. The whole process will be a lot easier and more enjoyable!

Whatever way you choose to go about things, I wish you all the best. You sound like a morally principled sort of person who wants to do things by the book, a respectable affair indeed!

[kashi4lyf]

i know a little about what Islam says . seems like the culture issue is fading , as parents in uk are slowly accepting what islam says and not culture , Personally look and find someone who you think is suitable and break it to your parents , if they dont agree get your local imaam or someone of a high status to explain , that doesnt mean she is a regular old slut work hard to find someone decent , and islam says u marry a woman on 4 / 5 things different in different hadiths

Beauty
wealth
religion
pious

^^ ^^ ^^

one sahaba askd the prophet that his parents suggested marriage and he was unsure The prophet replied the marriage is invalid go marry who you like hence saying that your choice is key , even if you are 1% unsure then the marriage is invalid and everything you do within your marriage is invalid !!

my advice 2u is to ask permission to look for someone and talk it through !!!

May Allah 4giv me if what i have said is wrong !!!

gd luck brother :afro:

[jimbo123]

As long as you aren't alone with a girl, it should be fine to meet them and get to know them. No hanky panky okay yaar? The best thing I can say is to build friendships. Just build friendships in general, widen the social circle because that leads to a higher volume of new acquaintances - and acquaintances can hook you up with nice Muslim girls!

Work on yourself and your people skills and enjoy socializing, then start thinking of marriage. The whole process will be a lot easier and more enjoyable!

Whatever way you choose to go about things, I wish you all the best. You sound like a morally principled sort of person who wants to do things by the book, a respectable affair indeed!
:thumrigh:

Yeah that's a good idea about widening the social circle before courting. My best friends are lads. The girls I know are nice but not friends, more like acquaintances that I very rarely see. Still, things will hopefully change once I finish uni and eventually start employment.

[jimbo123]

i know a little about what Islam says . seems like the culture issue is fading , as parents in uk are slowly accepting what islam says and not culture , Personally look and find someone who you think is suitable and break it to your parents , if they dont agree get your local imaam or someone of a high status to explain , that doesnt mean she is a regular old slut work hard to find someone decent , and islam says u marry a woman on 4 / 5 things different in different hadiths

Beauty
wealth
religion
pious

^^ ^^ ^^
I think being religious and pious are pretty much the same. I'm a bit doubtful about beauty and wealth though. They say that Islamically the reason you have a member of family during dates is so that you don't let your hormones make most of your decision.

one sahaba askd the prophet that his parents suggested marriage and he was unsure The prophet replied the marriage is invalid go marry who you like hence saying that your choice is key , even if you are 1% unsure then the marriage is invalid and everything you do within your marriage is invalid !!
Hmmm that's interesting.

[boomchuck]

A word of advice. Don't assume that just because the parents are pious and religious, that automatically the girl is. Find out her reputation. Soo many people I know have gotten engaged and then broke it off because they found out what their fiance/fiancee reps were..

But don't stress over it. As some others have said, you'll find what you're looking for when you least expect it.

Good luck :bhapi:

[T.Dimera]

A word of advice. Don't assume that just because the parents are pious and religious, that automatically the girl is. Find out her reputation. Soo many people I know have gotten engaged and then broke it off because they found out what their fiance/fiancee reps were..

But don't stress over it. As some others have said, you'll find what you're looking for when you least expect it.

Good luck :bhapi:

so if i'm reading between the lines of what you just said...the guys found out the girl is a slut..or vice versa. Well, we're all young adults, live with your choices you've made. I'm not saying judging people by their rep is right...but thats the way it is. If you want quality, you need to have the same value in yourself

[boomchuck]

so if i'm reading between the lines of what you just said...the guys found out the girl is a slut..or vice versa. Well, we're all young adults, live with your choices you've made. I'm not saying judging people by their rep is right...but thats the way it is. If you want quality, you need to have the same value in yourself

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[T.Dimera]

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huh?