Males: Do you want a wife who works...

[MrHarmfulOne]

outside the home?

Of course, this assumes you plan on getting/are married.

Personally, no I dont.

[Walktheline]

No sir.

[lili420]

outside the home?

Of course, this assumes you plan on getting/are married.

Personally, no I dont.
why do u want her not to work?

[SinghPimPin]

The bitch better have a job.

[MrHarmfulOne]

The bitch better have a job.

Why would you call your hypothetical future wife a bitch!? For shame!

[BengaliJalsha]

if my "future wife" wants to work and she enjoys her work i guess lol

[MrHarmfulOne]

why do u want her not to work?

Cuz I want my kids to be raised well.

[spice_of_life]

well she shud be capable of working outside and handle herself...doesnt matter whether she is going to work after marriage or not.

[phatty]

you said i cud work :hand:

[SinghPimPin]

This is my 500th post. I officially quit rate desi

[Walktheline]

why do u want her not to work?


Cause I'm gonna be the breadwinner. Her job is going to be to take care of the house and children. This is biologically the way its meant to be. I don't want my child being raised by a babysitter or a neighbor or by a teacher at school. She will nurture our children, and have them by her side at all times. Children learn by imitating adults, not by stupid fisher price toys or educational thingamajigs. When I come home from work, she'll have food ready in a nice clean house. She'll have plenty of time during the day to tend to herself and the kids. She'll exercise, watch the news, read books, learn about the world, take care of bills, paperwork, and basically maintain the homefront. I will provide absolutely anything she could possibly want and need and I'll show her how invaluable she is to my life. It'll be perfect.

[MrHarmfulOne]

you said i cud work :hand:

Psssh.. Youll be too huge from chocolate cake to leave the house! :Pelvic2:

[DingDong111]

no but shes already gotten her mind made up...o well good for me ima live off my wife...:dance:

[reaz]

I think at the moment I'd let her if she wants to. But if we have kids I'd expect her to spend some time at home too. I know I'd try to bring some work home as well.

[BigCrazyIndian]

Cause I'm gonna be the breadwinner. Her job is going to be to take care of the house and children. This is biologically the way its meant to be. I don't want my child being raised by a babysitter or a neighbor or by a teacher at school. She will nurture our children, and have them by her side at all times. Children learn by imitating adults, not by stupid fisher price toys or educational thingamajigs. When I come home from work, she'll have food ready in a nice clean house. She'll have plenty of time during the day to tend to herself and the kids. She'll exercise, watch the news, read books, learn about the world, take care of bills, paperwork, and basically maintain the homefront. I will provide absolutely anything she could possibly want and need and I'll show her how invaluable she is to my life. It'll be perfect.

you chauvinist pig!

[poojasxy]

why would u want to control ur wife's desire to work? ppl work when they are pregnant & take a leave of absence.

and they have day care centers in most offices if u already have kids. work is very important. it makes one feel more productive.

plus raising a child wont be tampered with. u'll still be a family no matter what.

[reaz]

Cause I'm gonna be the breadwinner. Her job is going to be to take care of the house and children. This is biologically the way its meant to be. I don't want my child being raised by a babysitter or a neighbor or by a teacher at school. She will nurture our children, and have them by her side at all times. Children learn by imitating adults, not by stupid fisher price toys or educational thingamajigs. When I come home from work, she'll have food ready in a nice clean house. She'll have plenty of time during the day to tend to herself and the kids. She'll exercise, watch the news, read books, learn about the world, take care of bills, paperwork, and basically maintain the homefront. I will provide absolutely anything she could possibly want and need and I'll show her how invaluable she is to my life. It'll be perfect.


haha.. that's perfect.. but really.. why would a girl go through so many years of education (I assume she's educated) just so that she can be a stay at home wife.

[Ac89]

yes

[MrHarmfulOne]

Cause I'm gonna be the breadwinner. Her job is going to be to take care of the house and children. This is biologically the way its meant to be. I don't want my child being raised by a babysitter or a neighbor or by a teacher at school. She will nurture our children, and have them by her side at all times. Children learn by imitating adults, not by stupid fisher price toys or educational thingamajigs. When I come home from work, she'll have food ready in a nice clean house. She'll have plenty of time during the day to tend to herself and the kids. She'll exercise, watch the news, read books, learn about the world, take care of bills, paperwork, and basically maintain the homefront. I will provide absolutely anything she could possibly want and need and I'll show her how invaluable she is to my life. It'll be perfect.

1. I thought you were female before. No, im not trying to be insulting at all. Unless you still are female. but are a lesbian with high hopes of gay marriage.. >_>;

2. I agree with you like 100%. I will also do chores around the house whenever possible, and always help her when she asks for it.

I dont think ALL women should do this by the way, this is just what I want for my family. I couldnt care less what the rest of you guys/girls want, so dont trip :)

[The Anti Desi]

Depends on what she works on. However....motherhood is her primary job.

[MrHarmfulOne]

why would u want to control ur wife's desire to work? ppl work when they are pregnant & take a leave of absence.

and they have day care centers in most offices if u already have kids. work is very important. it makes one feel more productive.

plus raising a child wont be tampered with. u'll still be a family no matter what.

I highly doubt a corporate daycare is the same as direct interaction with a loving mother.

Care to differ?

[Ac89]

Cause I'm gonna be the breadwinner. Her job is going to be to take care of the house and children. This is biologically the way its meant to be. I don't want my child being raised by a babysitter or a neighbor or by a teacher at school. She will nurture our children, and have them by her side at all times. Children learn by imitating adults, not by stupid fisher price toys or educational thingamajigs. When I come home from work, she'll have food ready in a nice clean house. She'll have plenty of time during the day to tend to herself and the kids. She'll exercise, watch the news, read books, learn about the world, take care of bills, paperwork, and basically maintain the homefront. I will provide absolutely anything she could possibly want and need and I'll show her how invaluable she is to my life. It'll be perfect.
and since when is it defined that the woman stay at home? Welcome to 2005...almost 2006. Why couldn't she work and you stay at home...like you said, "children learn by imitating adults"...etc.

[poojasxy]

chauvanistic control freak domineering pigs.


all of u!

[phatty]

Psssh.. Youll be too huge from chocolate cake to leave the house! :Pelvic2:
:p are u going to provide the cake for me

[Walktheline]

you chauvinist pig!


Shut yer trap, feminazi! This is the truth. How does that life not sound appealing? What is the downside of that life? It's full of enough activity to keep her busy. It's full of enough downtime to keep her relaxed and in stress free shape. You think I want my wife going into the work world where she'd have to suffer the almost insurmountable stress that I do? Do you think I want her to have to deal with crazy bosses, inflated egos, not enough sick days, etc? No! She's my queen and should be treated that way.... as long as she takes care of herself, me, and our children.

[MrHarmfulOne]

:p are u going to provide the cake for me

Ill either by you one every morning before I go to work, or bring one home every night =)

Better do some treadmill though! The cushion is only a cushion for so long

:(

Shut yer trap, feminazi! This is the truth. How does that life not sound appealing? What is the downside of that life? It's full of enough activity to keep her busy. It's full of enough downtime to keep her relaxed and in stress free shape. You think I want my wife going into the work world where she'd have to suffer the almost insurmountable stress that I do? Do you think I want her to have to deal with crazy bosses, inflated egos, not enough sick days, etc? No! She's my queen and should be treated that way.... as long as she takes care of herself, me, and our children.

This is exactly how I feel. Im not having her not work as some kind of punishment. Id rather the woman not deal with all that nonsense. She should be more free from stress, so that she can look after the kids and family better.

I know my father wouldnt want my mom to go through what he does.

[ilikecheese]

i do!
hell if any1 gonna stay home to do nothing, i rather it be me ^^

[solarez]

im liberal so id let her work if thats wat she wanted...

[Walktheline]

haha.. that's perfect.. but really.. why would a girl go through so many years of education (I assume she's educated) just so that she can be a stay at home wife.


Because the lines between academic intelligence and sensibility are blurred in desi land. If she has a degree, it means she's going to be able to run a house, have maturity, and be able to communicate with her spouse intelligently. Of course, this is all false.

[ilikecheese]

woman power!

[lili420]

Cause I'm gonna be the breadwinner. Her job is going to be to take care of the house and children. This is biologically the way its meant to be. I don't want my child being raised by a babysitter or a neighbor or by a teacher at school. She will nurture our children, and have them by her side at all times. Children learn by imitating adults, not by stupid fisher price toys or educational thingamajigs. When I come home from work, she'll have food ready in a nice clean house. She'll have plenty of time during the day to tend to herself and the kids. She'll exercise, watch the news, read books, learn about the world, take care of bills, paperwork, and basically maintain the homefront. I will provide absolutely anything she could possibly want and need and I'll show her how invaluable she is to my life. It'll be perfect.
I thought you were a girl :sarb: anyway, i understand ur point. but what bout when u dont have any kids?

[ilikecheese]

Because the lines between academic intelligence and sensibility are blurred in desi land. If she has a degree, it means she's going to be able to run a house, have maturity, and be able to communicate with her spouse intelligently. Of course, this is all false.
how does having a HS degree mean u can run a house? fine a HS degree so she wont be called stupid sinc ethats something everyone has, but do u really need a college degree to stay at home all day?

[phatty]

Ill either by you one every morning before I go to work, or bring one home every night =)

Better do some treadmill though! The cushion is only a cushion for so long

:(
.
will do boss :salut:
awww :hug: ur the best future hubby ever

[BigCrazyIndian]

Shut yer trap, feminazi! This is the truth. How does that life not sound appealing? What is the downside of that life? It's full of enough activity to keep her busy. It's full of enough downtime to keep her relaxed and in stress free shape. You think I want my wife going into the work world where she'd have to suffer the almost insurmountable stress that I do? Do you think I want her to have to deal with crazy bosses, inflated egos, not enough sick days, etc? No! She's my queen and should be treated that way.... as long as she takes care of herself, me, and our children.

guys like you with your monster penis' think you know what's right for us, but you couldn't be more wrong. some of us get a sense of accomplishment from going out and making something out of ourselves. if you want some dumb bitch who's going be content sitting at home, gussying herself up, and waiting for you to come home so you can ram her six ways from sunday, then that's you perogative, but good luck getting anything meaningful out of that relationship. Real women have real goals, and being a baby factory or a penis-pump with a heartbeat isn't one of them!!!

[MrHarmfulOne]

how does having a HS degree mean u can run a house? fine a HS degree so she wont be called stupid sinc ethats something everyone has, but do u really need a college degree to stay at home all day?

My friend laughed about this. Afghan women usually end up staying home even when they go to college. He told me they just let their daughters to make them feel good about themselves XD

Clever ass Afghans!

[xogirlie girlxo]

outside the home?

Of course, this assumes you plan on getting/are married.

Personally, no I dont.

Your view is good, I like that, I mean i would want to work because i have hopes and dreams too, and i dont want to go through college and get like a masters degree in something and just stay home, then again i dont want to work and not give my children the proper care, i especially dont want my husband mooching off of me, i think thats so discusting. I would wanna work but when i have kids i would want to be with them and focus all my attention on them, and i want my husband to provide everything for me, but real men like that are so rare, my neighbor's husband mooches off of her, they're desi and she just had a baby shes friggin 4 months old yet the woman leaves her in a day care center, its so ridiculous, I really need a real man, someone whos strong and assertive but will give me my freedom

[ilikecheese]

My friend laughed about this. Afghan women usually end up staying home even when they go to college. He told me they just let their daughters to make them feel good about themselves XD

Clever ass Afghans!
"they just let their daughters to make them feel good about themselves" u lost me there :\ and wtf why u sing XD :neutral:

[reaz]

Your view is good, I like that, I mean i would want to work because i have hopes and dreams too, and i dont want to go through college and get like a masters degree in something and just stay home, then again i dont want to work and not give my children the proper care, i especially dont want my husband mooching off of me, i think thats so discusting. I would wanna work but when i have kids i would want to be with them and focus all my attention on them, and i want my husband to provide everything for me, but real men like that are so rare, my neighbor's husband mooches off of her, they're desi and she just had a babay shes friggin 4 months old yet the woman leaves her in a day care center, its so ridiculous, I really need a real man, someone whos strong and assertive but will give me my freedom


:waveyN:

[MrHarmfulOne]

guys like you with your monster penis' think you know what's right for us, but you couldn't be more wrong. some of us get a sense of accomplishment from going out and making something out of ourselves. if you want some dumb bitch who's going be content sitting at home, gussying herself up, and waiting for you to come home so you can ram her six ways from sunday, then that's you perogative, but good luck getting anything meaningful out of that relationship. Real women have real goals, and being a baby factory or a penis-pump with a heartbeat isn't one of them!!!

Nobody insulted you in this topic. I dont think it's fair for you to insult what women have been doing for thousands of years(and not against their will often times).

Why would you call a stay at home mom a dumb bitch? That's so trashy.

Wait, are you white? You're not, right?

[ilikecheese]

Your view is good, I like that, I mean i would want to work because i have hopes and dreams too, and i dont want to go through college and get like a masters degree in something and just stay home, then again i dont want to work and not give my children the proper care, i especially dont want my husband mooching off of me, i think thats so discusting. I would wanna work but when i have kids i would want to be with them and focus all my attention on them, and i want my husband to provide everything for me, but real men like that are so rare, my neighbor's husband mooches off of her, they're desi and she just had a baby shes friggin 4 months old yet the woman leaves her in a day care center, its so ridiculous, I really need a real man, someone whos strong and assertive but will give me my freedom
basically u just want a daddy?

[reaz]

guys like you with your monster penis' think you know what's right for us, but you couldn't be more wrong. some of us get a sense of accomplishment from going out and making something out of ourselves. if you want some dumb bitch who's going be content sitting at home, gussying herself up, and waiting for you to come home so you can ram her six ways from sunday, then that's you perogative, but good luck getting anything meaningful out of that relationship. Real women have real goals, and being a baby factory or a penis-pump with a heartbeat isn't one of them!!!


LMAO!!

[Walktheline]

and since when is it defined that the woman stay at home? Welcome to 2005...almost 2006. Why couldn't she work and you stay at home...like you said, "children learn by imitating adults"...etc.


She's defined as staying at home because that's where the children are or will be by mid-afternoon. Look at mothers in the wild. Most mammalian offspring never venture far from their mothers. They might socialize with other offspring in the group, and may hang around the territorial father protecting the group, but they always stay close to their mother. Sending an impressionable child off to school, away from mother, is blatantly unnatural so.. Why do this any more than our society makes us?

[MrHarmfulOne]

"they just let their daughters to make them feel good about themselves" u lost me there :\ and wtf why u sing XD :neutral:

1. XD is not singing! It is a laughing face. Imagine your eyes scrunched up and your mouth wide open

2. My friend said they just let their daughters go to college so they feel like they did something before they get married.. I dunno, apparently it works *shrugs*

[MrHarmfulOne]

Your view is good, I like that, I mean i would want to work because i have hopes and dreams too, and i dont want to go through college and get like a masters degree in something and just stay home, then again i dont want to work and not give my children the proper care, i especially dont want my husband mooching off of me, i think thats so discusting. I would wanna work but when i have kids i would want to be with them and focus all my attention on them, and i want my husband to provide everything for me, but real men like that are so rare, my neighbor's husband mooches off of her, they're desi and she just had a baby shes friggin 4 months old yet the woman leaves her in a day care center, its so ridiculous, I really need a real man, someone whos strong and assertive but will give me my freedom

Exactly.

Im not saying Id be super taliban and not let her out of the house or anything. I never said anything about her not doing what she wants. I would just prefer a wife who didnt want to work anyways, so I wouldnt be controlling anybody.

See? Im a nice guy :)

[Walktheline]

guys like you with your monster penis' think you know what's right for us, but you couldn't be more wrong. some of us get a sense of accomplishment from going out and making something out of ourselves. if you want some dumb bitch who's going be content sitting at home, gussying herself up, and waiting for you to come home so you can ram her six ways from sunday, then that's you perogative, but good luck getting anything meaningful out of that relationship. Real women have real goals, and being a baby factory or a penis-pump with a heartbeat isn't one of them!!!


a sense of accomplishment at what cost? the cost of our kid growing up feeling alienated and unloved? Wanting to be like jimmy across the street whose mom stayed at home and took care of him? What's the real goal anyway, getting a promotion.. becoming CEO or having a healthy family life?

[Walktheline]

how does having a HS degree mean u can run a house? fine a HS degree so she wont be called stupid sinc ethats something everyone has, but do u really need a college degree to stay at home all day?


reread the last line of my post: "Of course, this is all false"
The older generation of women in my family didn't go to school beyond 3rd grade and they raised healthy, intelligent children. It doesn't take a degree to understand and carry through the bonds of marriage and family.

[xogirlie girlxo]

basically u just want a daddy?
No way, I do not want a daddy, and i dont need someone super duper rich, but i want someone who understands and appreciates that i am taking care of his kids and being a mother and i want him to realize that it is tough, and i just DO NOT want someone who mooches off of me, a man taking money from his wife turns me off, i have a lot of dreams for myself, marriage is way down the line, I wanna be rich, I wanna go to med school, or grad school and be financially well off, but if my husband mooches off of me, my heart will just break, my neighbor keeps coming into my mind, he makes her work like a dog, and her face looks old from stress . . . being a mother and dealing with ur children's shit like puberty, periods, sexuality, drugs, teen years, that is a lot, and for those talking about a sense of accomplishment, seeing ur children well bred and happy and succesful gives u a heck of a lot of sense of accomplishment

[xogirlie girlxo]

:waveyN:
hehehe hello

[BigCrazyIndian]

a sense of accomplishment at what cost? the cost of our kid growing up feeling alienated and unloved? Wanting to be like jimmy across the street whose mom stayed at home and took care of him? What's the real goal anyway, getting a promotion.. becoming CEO or having a healthy family life?

having the mother stay at home is no guarantee of a healthy family life. There's just as a good a chance that the oppressed matriarch will end up becoming a wine guzzling alocholic due to her dreams being crushed by a giant turd that it took 9 months to push out. It'll probably be better that I don't stay home anyway because I'm definitely going to beat my kids.

Plus, I think my dream of being a pornstar will more than make up for not being at home when my kids become teenagers and get to hang out with all my pornstar friends.

[superblade]

In the future, i'll be financially well off...I can bankroll any bon-bon-eating-soon-to-be-fat chick who wants to shoot out my superior genetic prosperity.......

[Walktheline]

having the mother stay at home is no guarantee of a healthy family life. There's just as a good a chance that the oppressed matriarch will end up becoming a wine guzzling alocholic due to her dreams being crushed by a giant turd that it took 9 months to push out. It'll probably be better that I don't stay home anyway because I'm definitely going to beat my kids.

Plus, I think my dream of being a pornstar will more than make up for not being at home when my kids become teenagers and get to hang out with all my pornstar friends.


If she's going drive herself to the bottle from a home life, she'll DEFINITELY become an alcoholic if she's got a 9-5, dinner duty, soccer practice chauffer duty, helping the kids with homework, etc.
In which case, it was always futile.

[ladoo ram]

see if she wants to then i have no probs but i will work my ass off just to sypport me n her ..n ill make sure i fullfill all her wants

[plummet]

outside the home?

Of course, this assumes you plan on getting/are married.

Personally, no I dont.
wow you are exactly whats wrong with desi society today..for that matter any society.

[sachin_patel]

depends..on her choice.. my income and her expense ;)

[xogirlie girlxo]

wow you are exactly whats wrong with desi society today..for that matter any society.

Ok why does everyone think that view is so worng? Maybe having weak family ties, and bad upbrining is whats wrong with society today, its not like hes going to beat his wife and tell her to stay home he will find someone with the same views as him everyone wants something different, a mother is the most important thing in a childs life, studies have shown that kids who are touched by their mothers since infancy develop better, touching stimulates growth and helps nerv cells to grow, the touch of a mother is such a stimulant, and children especially when they are little r so vulnerable they need their mother by them at all times, also kids whos mothers read to them and talk to them develop a better vocabulary, i mean women can work, but y wouldnt u want ur child to be ur first priority, they will be the ones looking after u when ur old, unless u want to live in a nursing center or whatnot, and a woman can always start working when her children become school age, i just dont understand y children arent anyone's first priorities anymore, maybe thats why suicide rates r so high, i see kids with the nicest houses and rich parents feeling depressed and doing drugs, kids need a lot of attention

[MrHarmfulOne]

Ok why does everyone think that view is so worng? Maybe having weak family ties, and bad upbrining is whats wrong with society today, its not like hes going to beat his wife and tell her to stay home he will find someone with the same views as him everyone wants something different, a mother is the most important thing in a childs life, studies have shown that kids who are touched by their mothers since infancy develop better, touching stimulates growth and helps nerv cells to grow, the touch of a mother is such a stimulant, and children especially when they are little r so vulnerable they need their mother by them at all times, also kids whos mothers read to them and talk to them develop a better vocabulary, i mean women can work, but y wouldnt u want ur child to be ur first priority, they will be the ones looking after u when ur old, unless u want to live in a nursing center or whatnot, and a woman can always start working when her children become school age, i just dont understand y children arent anyone's first priorities anymore, maybe thats why suicide rates r so high, i see kids with the nicest houses and rich parents feeling depressed and doing drugs, kids need a lot of attention

That's it. Just give me your dad's phone number. We will arrange the wedding :)

[xogirlie girlxo]

That's it. Just give me your dad's phone number. We will arrange the wedding :)

hahahahaha

[ilikecheese]

No way, I do not want a daddy, and i dont need someone super duper rich, but i want someone who understands and appreciates that i am taking care of his kids and being a mother and i want him to realize that it is tough, and i just DO NOT want someone who mooches off of me, a man taking money from his wife turns me off, i have a lot of dreams for myself, marriage is way down the line, I wanna be rich, I wanna go to med school, or grad school and be financially well off, but if my husband mooches off of me, my heart will just break, my neighbor keeps coming into my mind, he makes her work like a dog, and her face looks old from stress . . . being a mother and dealing with ur children's shit like puberty, periods, sexuality, drugs, teen years, that is a lot, and for those talking about a sense of accomplishment, seeing ur children well bred and happy and succesful gives u a heck of a lot of sense of accomplishment
okay so marriage is down the line for u, like way down. u wanna set urself up first, but when u get married, u dont want ur hubby mooching off u. he has to earn his own? and what do u do with ur money? sit on it? while ur hubby pays for everything? yet when u have the kids, u wanna continue "mooching" off ur hubby? so u become a doctor, work ur ass on getting grad school done with, to later just stay at home and take care of the kids? how long do u plan no working before u see urself "set" financially?

[xogirlie girlxo]

okay so marriage is down the line for u, like way down. u wanna set urself up first, but when u get married, u dont want ur hubby mooching off u. he has to earn his own? and what do u do with ur money? sit on it? while ur hubby pays for everything? yet when u have the kids, u wanna continue "mooching" off ur hubby? so u become a doctor, work ur ass on getting grad school done with, to later just stay at home and take care of the kids? how long do u plan no working before u see urself "set" financially?

Ok! so lets answer ur questions, first off by down the line i mean after i finish my education which will probabaly be a masters in something, and if i decide to go to med school or for further education im not going to make my husband pay for it theres things such as financial aid and government loans and grants, and im still contemplating wheather i want to go to med school or not, its too much work,becoming a doctor is not for everyone, and the term "financially set" is different for everyone, its not like i wanna buy a house or something honestly i just want money to donate to charity and start a non profit organization or whatever, and during the first couple of yrs of marriage ill work, but when i have children i want to take care of them especially during infancy, and i want my husband to understand that and provide for his wife and kids, and no i do not want him mooching off of me, if im not working how can he mooch off of me? thats the thing i dont want my man getting used to me working , so basically i wanna be educated i want to work but when i have kids i want to take a few yrs off until my children are ready for preschool or kindergarten, and i want a husband who shares my views and who is not a sissy and gives his wife and kids a good life

[hmguy]

wow you are exactly whats wrong with desi society today..for that matter any society.

I'm going to have to agree, have your wife stay at home is not the only solution to ensuring you children grow up well. My question is why is it the guy's decision for the woman to stay at home? My mom's the bread winner in my family, so it was my father that took the back seat and stayed home. But more importantly, a lot of women don't want to stay home and be a house wife, putting them into that position, drives them into depression, with the result being that they either leave, have affairs, commit suicide, or continuous fight between spouses that scar a child for life. Yes, you have to factor your duties to your children but if you take the leftist desis point of view, your children will suffer anyways. There's nothing wrong with childcare as long as the people taking care of your children are good to them. In addition, there's the additional option of of living close by the relatives, provided you can stand living so close to them (any :) Everybody Loves Raymond fans?). My point is that you and future wife/husband have option so discuss them. Just because your the guy doesn't mean anything, if your wife makes twice as much as you, guess what? You're probably going to be losing the argument anyways and more likely to be sitting at home with applesauce on your face. My personal view is I'd want my wish to work, honestly because I think she's want some more fulfillment in her life than just kids and running the house. Besides, it's healthy for your relationship if your the type that works alot, you don't want her feeling neglected. Just remeber to bring home flowers and cook dinner once in awhile to make up for your time way :) otherwise it's a another cold night on the couch. :p

[chunky]

my wife's job will be to fuck me on demand & take care of the chitlins.

of course I expect her to fuck me outside of the home. If that bitch gives me any of the "i only work at home" crap i'm going to backhand her into the neighbor's yard.

[Walktheline]

my wife's job will be to fuck me on demand & take care of the chitlins.

of course I expect her to fuck me outside of the home. If that bitch gives me any of the "i only work at home" crap i'm going to backhand her into the neighbor's yard.

dude, aren't chitlins pig intestines? :(

[xogirlie girlxo]

I'm going to have to agree, have your wife stay at home is not the only solution to ensuring you children grow up well. My question is why is it the guy's decision for the woman to stay at home? My mom's the bread winner in my family, so it was my father that took the back seat and stayed home. But more importantly, a lot of women don't want to stay home and be a house wife, putting them into that position, drives them into depression, with the result being that they either leave, have affairs, commit suicide, or continuous fight between spouses that scar a child for life. Yes, you have to factor your duties to your children but if you take the leftist desis point of view, your children will suffer anyways. There's nothing wrong with childcare as long as the people taking care of your children are good to them. In addition, there's the additional option of of living close by the relatives, provided you can stand living so close to them (any :) Everybody Loves Raymond fans?). My point is that you and future wife/husband have option so discuss them. Just because your the guy doesn't mean anything, if your wife makes twice as much as you, guess what? You're probably going to be losing the argument anyways and more likely to be sitting at home with applesauce on your face. My personal view is I'd want my wish to work, honestly because I think she's want some more fulfillment in her life than just kids and running the house. Besides, it's healthy for your relationship if your the type that works alot, you don't want her feeling neglected. Just remeber to bring home flowers and cook dinner once in awhile to make up for your time way :) otherwise it's a another cold night on the couch. :p

awww hey thats a nice way of looking at it also, but what if u do make twice as much as us husband he turns out to be a greedy bastard? thats the only thing im worried about, and im not saying i will never work its just that i will work after my children start school, and ur right working is important, but if i left my newborn with someone id probably worry about it all day, thats just me and everything that everyone ha slisted here r opinions and in the end everyone is entitled to their own opinions, and its whatever works best for ur family . ..

[chunky]

dude, aren't chitlins pig intestines? :(

i live in the south, that's what we call kids. . . as well as the provincial delicacy you've referenced.

[MrHarmfulOne]

I'm going to have to agree, have your wife stay at home is not the only solution to ensuring you children grow up well. My question is why is it the guy's decision for the woman to stay at home? My mom's the bread winner in my family, so it was my father that took the back seat and stayed home. But more importantly, a lot of women don't want to stay home and be a house wife, putting them into that position, drives them into depression, with the result being that they either leave, have affairs, commit suicide, or continuous fight between spouses that scar a child for life. Yes, you have to factor your duties to your children but if you take the leftist desis point of view, your children will suffer anyways. There's nothing wrong with childcare as long as the people taking care of your children are good to them. In addition, there's the additional option of of living close by the relatives, provided you can stand living so close to them (any :) Everybody Loves Raymond fans?). My point is that you and future wife/husband have option so discuss them. Just because your the guy doesn't mean anything, if your wife makes twice as much as you, guess what? You're probably going to be losing the argument anyways and more likely to be sitting at home with applesauce on your face. My personal view is I'd want my wish to work, honestly because I think she's want some more fulfillment in her life than just kids and running the house. Besides, it's healthy for your relationship if your the type that works alot, you don't want her feeling neglected. Just remeber to bring home flowers and cook dinner once in awhile to make up for your time way :) otherwise it's a another cold night on the couch. :p

Wow.

This is the weirdest shit I have read in a while.. lol ur mom makes more than your dad.. how the **** did that happen O_O

[Walktheline]

i live in the south, that's what we call kids. . . as well as the provincial delicacy you've referenced.

you southerners are weeeeird.

[Walktheline]

Wow.

This is the weirdest shit I have read in a while.. lol ur mom makes more than your dad.. how the **** did that happen O_O

hah, you're a dickhole. :D

[hmguy]

awww hey thats a nice way of looking at it also, but what if u do make twice as much as us husband he turns out to be a greedy bastard? thats the only thing im worried about, and im not saying i will never work its just that i will work after my children start school, and ur right working is important, but if i left my newborn with someone id probably worry about it all day, thats just me and everything that everyone ha slisted here r opinions and in the end everyone is entitled to their own opinions, and its whatever works best for ur family . ..

If your husband's a greedy bastard then you can do either three things...kick him out of the house, withhold money from him (might motivate him to work harder), or withhold sex..just make sure your husband doesn't look as good or better than you :p....he'll cave one way or another and if that doesn't work knee him in the nuts...sure that'll make him think twice :p

I can undertsand you worring about your children and it really does depend on the person. Growing up for me, my mom had 3 jobs and my father had two so my folks weren't around alot but my folks spent more time teaching us how to be independent, teaching what to do in an emergency, what to do and take whn your sick, cooking (made awesome mocha pancakes :) when I was 6), etc. All I'm saying is that desis really do need to get witht he times and adopt some medern perspectives

[MrHarmfulOne]

If your husband's a greedy bastard then you can do either three things...kick him out of the house, withhold money from him (might motivate him to work harder), or withhold sex..just make sure your husband doesn't look as good or better than you :p....he'll cave one way or another and if that doesn't work knee him in the nuts...sure that'll make him think twice :p

I can undertsand you worring about your children and it really does depend on the person. Growing up for me, my mom had 3 jobs and my father had two so my folks weren't around alot but my folks spent more time teaching us how to be independent, teaching what to do in an emergency, what to do and take whn your sick, cooking (made awesome mocha pancakes :) when I was 6), etc. All I'm saying is that desis really do need to get witht he times and adopt some medern perspectives


Nope. Im actually getting MORE conservative. Fuck being "modern".

[MrHarmfulOne]

hah, you're a dickhole. :D

It's just a VERY foreign(how ironic!) concept to me :p

[xogirlie girlxo]

If your husband's a greedy bastard then you can do either three things...kick him out of the house, withhold money from him (might motivate him to work harder), or withhold sex..just make sure your husband doesn't look as good or better than you :p....he'll cave one way or another and if that doesn't work knee him in the nuts...sure that'll make him think twice :p

I can undertsand you worring about your children and it really does depend on the person. Growing up for me, my mom had 3 jobs and my father had two so my folks weren't around alot but my folks spent more time teaching us how to be independent, teaching what to do in an emergency, what to do and take whn your sick, cooking (made awesome mocha pancakes :) when I was 6), etc. All I'm saying is that desis really do need to get witht he times and adopt some medern perspectives

i cant kick my husband out of the house, my kids need a father lol, and withholding sex, does that work? and i kinda so want a husband that looks atleast as good as me, i want my children to be good looking. . wow ur parents really worked hard but ur children can be independent even while ur with them i started making eggs and tea at the age of 7, all im saying is that its not feesible to leave an infant with someone they r so vulnerable and that is the time that they need their mothers the most, and u know what else very important? A woman should always marry a man who makes as much as or more money than her, and the guy should be as much as or more educated than the woman, like u cant have a Ph.D and then marry someone who has only completed high school, this creates conflicts, theres just sooo much that goes into account when you're looking to tie the knot *sigh*

[reaz]

hehehe hello

I remember our little discussion on this very topic some time back. How've you been? havent seen you around.

[xogirlie girlxo]

I remember our little discussion on this very topic some time back. How've you been? havent seen you around.

ive been well how've u been?

[chunky]

i cant kick my husband out of the house, my kids need a father lol, and withholding sex, does that work? and i kinda so want a husband that looks atleast as good as me, i want my children to be good looking. . wow ur parents really worked hard but ur children can be independent even while ur with them i started making eggs and tea at the age of 7, all im saying is that its not feesible to leave an infant with someone they r so vulnerable and that is the time that they need their mothers the most, and u know what else very important? A woman should always marry a man who makes as much as or more money than her, and the guy should be as much as or more educated than the woman, like u cant have a Ph.D and then marry someone who has only completed high school, this creates conflicts, theres just sooo much that goes into account when you're looking to tie the knot *sigh*


so what happens if the woman is the CEO of a fortune 500 company and smashingly attractive? She'll have all of what, 3 other guys to pick from?

Putting all those rules on relationships ends up in divorces.

[hmguy]

Wow.

This is the weirdest shit I have read in a while.. lol ur mom makes more than your dad.. how the **** did that happen O_O

How is that weird? My mom just awesome, really driven and just got promoted a lot. She's been my role model, in the sense that she taught me that the sly's the limit in how far you can go when you put your mind to things.My father not big on change, he'd rather work the same job day in and day out, which is cool as well.

As for becoming more conservative, I'd go the other way. I know every Indian girl I talk always complain that the guys they date are way too traditional.

[hmguy]

hah, you're a dickhole. :D

:rofl:

[reaz]

ive been well how've u been?

been great.

[xogirlie girlxo]

so what happens if the woman is the CEO of a fortune 500 company and smashingly attractive? She'll have all of what, 3 other guys to pick from?

Putting all those rules on relationships ends up in divorces.

No if a woman feels stifled and she looks at the guy and feels like she could have done better, and the guy feels like hes shit compared to her thats what leads to divorces,i mean ur wife might divorce u for the backhand u give her upon her refusal of sex, and newsflash everyone has unwritten relationship rules . . .

[xogirlie girlxo]

been great.
good to know :)

[Walktheline]

No if a woman feels stifled and she looks at the guy and feels like she could have done better, and the guy feels like hes shit compared to her thats what leads to divorces,i mean ur wife might divorce u for the backhand u give her upon her refusal of sex, and newsflash everyone has unwritten relationship rules . . .


have you ever been married?

[chunky]

No if a woman feels stifled and she looks at the guy and feels like she could have done better, and the guy feels like hes shit compared to her thats what leads to divorces,i mean ur wife might divorce u for the backhand u give her upon her refusal of sex, and newsflash everyone has unwritten relationship rules . . .

true, but you're going based upon factors that change easily - If a main is gainfully employed at the time of marriage, but then the company he's working for belly ups and he's delivering pizzas in the meantime, do you dump him?

if a woman looks at a man and feels like she could have done better, she should off herself for agreeing to a marriage before she was ready to accept what a marriage truly is.

[xogirlie girlxo]

have you ever been married?

has anyone on this post been married? we all have a basic conception of what we want in a spouse

[R.J]

the Mrs has to earn at least as much as me or she can piss off.

simple.

[MrHarmfulOne]

How is that weird? My mom just awesome, really driven and just got promoted a lot. She's been my role model, in the sense that she taught me that the sly's the limit in how far you can go when you put your mind to things.My father not big on change, he'd rather work the same job day in and day out, which is cool as well.

As for becoming more conservative, I'd go the other way. I know every Indian girl I talk always complain that the guys they date are way too traditional.

*shakes head*

Look at how America/England/Canada has brainwashed you desis into thinking we are inferior...

[Walktheline]

*shakes head*

Look at how America/England/Canada has brainwashed you desis into thinking we are inferior...


You're a greencard seekers dream come true.
And how dare you dis his mother like that.

[hmguy]

i cant kick my husband out of the house, my kids need a father lol, and withholding sex, does that work? and i kinda so want a husband that looks atleast as good as me, i want my children to be good looking. . wow ur parents really worked hard but ur children can be independent even while ur with them i started making eggs and tea at the age of 7, all im saying is that its not feesible to leave an infant with someone they r so vulnerable and that is the time that they need their mothers the most, and u know what else very important? A woman should always marry a man who makes as much as or more money than her, and the guy should be as much as or more educated than the woman, like u cant have a Ph.D and then marry someone who has only completed high school, this creates conflicts, theres just sooo much that goes into account when you're looking to tie the knot *sigh*


I person agree a woman should marry a guy that makes as much or more money than her just for the fact that it shows he's driven and what to move up more. But, don't you think you'd know what kind of person you're marrying before you tie the knot (though I understand that it doesn't always happen). As for withholding sex, it works on some and it doesn't on other, some will give you the back hand and others will try to work thing out. It really depends on the person. From a guys perspective, my fear is that of the woman getting to comfortable at home, I can understand her not wanting to work but there's going to be a point a which the kids can be on their own and I want her to want to work. Furthermore, from an employment prespective, companies don't like seeing large gaps of unemployement, generally the longer your away from work the hard it will be to get back into the job market.

[xogirlie girlxo]

true, but you're going based upon factors that change easily - If a main is gainfully employed at the time of marriage, but then the company he's working for belly ups and he's delivering pizzas in the meantime, do you dump him?

if a woman looks at a man and feels like she could have done better, she should off herself for agreeing to a marriage before she was ready to accept what a marriage truly is.

thats why it sucks going into the business world theres such little job security thats why everyone wants a doctor, there will always be sick ppl so a doc wont go jobless anytime soon .. . . hehehe j/k! I personally would not dump him if the company goes belly up, i was talking about a diff scenario, like if u get married to a guy and right off the bat he wants to use ur money and live off of u thats wrongm, the example u gave is diff, and as far as it goes to thinking u could have done better u should right off the bat go for what is better so u dont look at ur husband and feel like i could do better,u should get married to someone who u know money wont be an issue with,but ur right money comes and goes as long as the guy isnt a greedy SOB, and id totally understand if somehow my husband got laid off and needed money, thats not being greedy thats just being forced to do something under dire circumstances

[MrHarmfulOne]

You're a greencard seekers dream come true.
And how dare you dis his mother like that.

Damn right I am their dream come true. Ill diss his mama as I please. Look at how he refers to people who dont follow what his whack family did. And he insulted MY family too. He called them primitive and backwards.


he calls us primitive and backwards. of course, you probably chose to be an ass to me cuz the other guy is more popular/well known than me.

Im sorry, self loathing desis always piss me off.

[BC_Broad]

isn't that what the in-laws are for? they can raise my babies.

[chunky]

thats why it sucks going into the business world theres such little job security thats why everyone wants a doctor, there will always be sick ppl so a doc wont go jobless anytime soon .. . . hehehe j/k! I personally would not dump him if the company goes belly up, i was talking about a diff scenario, like if u get married to a guy and right off the bat he wants to use ur money and live off of u thats wrongm, the example u gave is diff, and as far as it goes to thinking u could have done better u should right off the bat go for what is better so u dont look at ur husband and feel like i could do better,u should get married to someone who u know money wont be an issue with,but ur right money comes and goes as long as the guy isnt a greedy SOB, and id totally understand if somehow my husband got laid off and needed money, thats not being greedy thats just being forced to do something under dire circumstances

Perhaps you should present your ideas in that format then. Encourage people to be sure that they're marrying someone that has the same financial mindset.

There would be nothing wrong IMO if a successful woman married a man who made half her income. They would both contribute a fair share to common expenses but obviously she would have more disposable income going into her personal account. A difference in income doesn't make two people incompatible as your previous comments suggested.

[hmguy]

*shakes head*

Look at how America/England/Canada has brainwashed you desis into thinking we are inferior...

:wtf: , NOBODY has brainwashed me into thinking I'm inferior. Should I have an overdeveloped and unwarranted superiority complex instead? How does being modern make you inferior. I I'm sorry to tell you but the desis girls around her seem to be embracing a more progressive stance. Guys having view like your is probably one of the reason why more desis girls are pursuing interracial relationships, which is cool as well

[Walktheline]

Damn right I am their dream come true. Ill diss his mama as I please. Look at how he refers to people who dont follow what his whack family did.

he calls us primitive and backwards.

Im sorry, self loathing desis always piss me off.

Way to insult someone's family and upbringing. And you seem to find women inferior as well (which is undoubtedly your misguided main reason for delegating them to housework and raising kids) And if I recall correctly you're anti-social too. The only loathsome desi here is you.

[chunky]

isn't that what the in-laws are for? they can raise my babies.

Lawlz.

I'll be your mr. nanny if you ever get really loaded.

[PreciousPari]

isn't that what the in-laws are for? they can raise my babies.

Haha exactly! I don't trust strangers babysittin my kiddos sorry. Nah uh.

[BC_Broad]

Lawlz.

I'll be your mr. nanny if you ever get really loaded.

sure, but you're gonna have to wear the uniform and you can't see it until you accept the job.

i love how some of the guys don't want girls to work but, when there's a discussion about what they hate about desi girls, the first thing to come outta their mouth is "gold digger."

[BC_Broad]

Haha exactly! I don't trust strangers babysittin my kiddos sorry. Nah uh.

i plan on taking time off until my spawn go to pre-school...then i can go back to work and have hours that will allow me to drop em off and pick em up.

[Walktheline]

isn't that what the in-laws are for? they can raise my babies.


everytime I argue with my mom she threatens that she'll babysit my kids and teach them to love all the things I hate, ie bollywood, eggplant, gross guju food. :p

[xogirlie girlxo]

Perhaps you should present your ideas in that format then. Encourage people to be sure that they're marrying someone that has the same financial mindset.

There would be nothing wrong IMO if a successful woman married a man who made half her income. They would both contribute a fair share to common expenses but obviously she would have more disposable income going into her personal account. A difference in income doesn't make two people incompatible as your previous comments suggested.

actually a difference in income with the woman making more would make some men feel inferior, and her disposable income thats going into her bank account will make her feel superior and if shes a sucessful business woman she will do something useful with that money like invest in stocks and buy real estate she will increase her money, and its just weird, she'll have stocks and property and what will the guy have?

[Sir Smoke-A-Lot]

of course she is gona work

[XBIHX]

a hubby who doesnt want his wife to work is alot better.

[PreciousPari]

i plan on taking time off until my spawn go to pre-school...then i can go back to work and have hours that will allow me to drop em off and pick em up.

That was my plan too. But if my inlaws are in the same area, then I would just leave my babies with them. And work for a lil while until they are 6-9 months old. I want to be there when they take their first step and say mommy. :p

[xogirlie girlxo]

i plan on taking time off until my spawn go to pre-school...then i can go back to work and have hours that will allow me to drop em off and pick em up.
Yea good thinking man, and the in laws taking care of the kids is not a bad idea

[BC_Broad]

everytime I argue with my mom she threatens that she'll babysit my kids and teach them to love all the things I hate, ie bollywood, eggplant, gross guju food. :p

my moms the same but i hope she actually does teach them...it'll make our lives easier.

[reaz]

my co worker who sits a cubicle across my office is out of office. He's gone to china to bring back his 15 month old son who's been living with the grand parents.

they couldnt find an appropriate day care for the child so they sent him back to china to live with the grandparents when he was 8. now they are bringing him back cause he's beginning to recognise and speak.

both my co worker and his wife were unwilling to take time out for the child after he was born. they only talk to their child via phone at the moment.

[superblade]

If you relegate child-rearing to your moms...you're ultimately deferring motherhood...which means your daughter is going to dump her kids on you when you become an old foogie....karma of sorts?

[BC_Broad]

That was my plan too. But if my inlaws are in the same area, then I would just leave my babies with them. And work for a lil while until they are 6-9 months old. I want to be there when they take their first step and say mommy. :p

wow, you'd wanna go back to work that fast? i'm gonna need some time to get back into shape (im not heidi klum) and breast feeding is gonna take time.

[xogirlie girlxo]

my co worker who sits a cubicle across my office is out of office. He's gone to china to bring back his 15 month old son who's been living with the grand parents.

they couldnt find an appropriate day care for the child so they sent him back to china to live with the grandparents when he was 8. now they are bringing him back cause he's beginning to recognise and speak.

both my co worker and his wife were unwilling to take time out for the child after he was born. they only talk to their child via phone at the moment.

Thats awful

[BC_Broad]

If you relegate child-rearing to your moms...you're ultimately deferring motherhood...which means your daughter is going to dump her kids on you when you become an old foogie....karma of sorts?

im not gonna dump my kids on my mom or my in-laws but i'd want them to teach them certain things because they know things that we still won't...more wisdom. i, personally, wouldnt mind doing the same for my grandchildren when the time comes.

[superblade]

my co worker who sits a cubicle across my office is out of office. He's gone to china to bring back his 15 month old son who's been living with the grand parents.

they couldnt find an appropriate day care for the child so they sent him back to china to live with the grandparents when he was 8. now they are bringing him back cause he's beginning to recognise and speak.

both my co worker and his wife were unwilling to take time out for the child after he was born. they only talk to their child via phone at the moment.


that's how serial killers arise....

[reaz]

Thats awful


yea. obviously whenever the topic of his child comes up the atmosphere becomes a bit tense.. atleast that's what happened when he was talking to me about it.. cause i found it rather unnatural..

during halloween his son didnt come, apparently he was here last year and so everyone kept asking where he was and it was rather hard to see the look on the guy's face.

[shmooks]

wellllllllllllllllll i would work. i would have to or i'd die of boredom, im very much a careerwoman. dont know if id work after i had a kid though, maybe part time.

[PreciousPari]

wow, you'd wanna go back to work that fast? i'm gonna need some time to get back into shape (im not heidi klum) and breast feeding is gonna take time.

Yeah because I figure that working will keep me active and sitting around breast feeding my babies will just add more weight that I don't need. lol Im gonna work, become a gym rat and save money. Cause babies don't come cheap. :neutral:

Did you know there is a paternity leave? My bf was telling me about it and he said that he would take it to help me out with the lil tyke. lol

[xogirlie girlxo]

yea. obviously whenever the topic of his child comes up the atmosphere becomes a bit tense.. atleast that's what happened when he was talking to me about it.. cause i found it rather unnatural..

during halloween his son didnt come, apparently he was here last year and so everyone kept asking where he was and it was rather hard to see the look on the guy's face.
If your going to have kids atleast take care of them, and if u think your career is more important thats fine too, but when u do have kids remember that as a parent they need u the most

[reaz]

If your going to have kids atleast take care of them, and if u think your career is more important thats fine too, but when u do have kids remember that as a parent they need u the most


the thing is that he's in his mid 30s and his wife is also in her 30s.. things were not going to change so they did it..

[BC_Broad]

Yeah because I figure that working will keep me active and sitting around breast feeding my babies will just add more weight that I don't need. lol Im gonna work, become a gym rat and save money. Cause babies don't come cheap. :neutral:

Did you know there is a paternity leave? My bf was telling me about it and he said that he would take it to help me out with the lil tyke. lol

breast feeding actually helps aid weight loss. that's cool if that works for you. i'd wanna take 3-5 years off but i wouldn't expect my husband to do the same lol.

[**bambina**]

when or if i get married... i know my husband will probably not want me to do the job i do.. and i actually would happily give it up... not working in total, but the job i do... when i do start my own family, ofcourse my family would be my number one priority, so i would want to spend the 1st year with my children after they are born if i can. i would work sumwher part time... i dont want to be the kinda wife or mother thats not home in the evening when her husband comes from work or her kids come from school. these things are important to me. thats one the main reason i am persuing child psycology coz then i could work at my own pace... or do a job wher not my family revolves around my job, but my job revovles around my family.

[chunky]

actually a difference in income with the woman making more would make some men feel inferior, and her disposable income thats going into her bank account will make her feel superior and if shes a sucessful business woman she will do something useful with that money like invest in stocks and buy real estate she will increase her money, and its just weird, she'll have stocks and property and what will the guy have?

well, i'm just pointing out that it's not an absolute.

[chunky]

a hubby who doesnt want his wife to work is alot better.

you appear to be very good looking.

[hmguy]

Damn right I am their dream come true. Ill diss his mama as I please. Look at how he refers to people who dont follow what his whack family did. And he insulted MY family too. He called them primitive and backwards.


he calls us primitive and backwards. of course, you probably chose to be an ass to me cuz the other guy is more popular/well known than me.

Im sorry, self loathing desis always piss me off.

I find it funny you hate seem hate the Brits and the Canadians, yet you behave just like them. Except in this case, your views set limits on our race, mine seek to remove those limits entire. I never said anything insuted your family or call you primitive, but the fact, the concept of a woman making more than a man is new to you shows that is proving my point. As for being your family's dream come true, your more like to be the oppressor, that tends to disagree with everyone but your self, because your never wrong right? That is what makes you primitive and backwards. You forget as well, I'm not trying to force my views on anyone, honestly you really can't, people have this little thing we call choice, and that allows them to make their own decision. Personally, I don't really have a construct of what it is to be desi, but it as though you do and well don't you think you might want to examine them just a bit? I made the point (yeah it's geeky, but the guys a computer geek anyways) if you can update your virus definition, its can't hurt your updating your points of view. Honestly, this world is changing whether you want to or not, my view is always that it never hurts learn from others and gain a new perspective

[PreciousPari]

breast feeding actually helps aid weight loss. that's cool if that works for you. i'd wanna take 3-5 years off but i wouldn't expect my husband to do the same lol.

Yeah I know it does but what I mean is, I don't want to sit around home all day breast feeding, cooking, cleaning and all that jazz when I could be up and active. Cause to me, thats important. My babies are more important yes, and I will always come home to them. Cause once you leave work to take care of the kiddos, it gets hard to go back to work. I'll just use the breast pump and leave 10 bottles for my sus. lol

Nah, paternity leave for a guy is only like a month or two. I think. I'll make sure one of us is working or both! :p

[superblade]

breast feeding actually helps aid weight loss. that's cool if that works for you. i'd wanna take 3-5 years off but i wouldn't expect my husband to do the same lol.

Oh, speaking of.......

It also causes involution of the uterus, so your body gets back in shape faster.
It fosters the mother-baby bond, which is beneficial to mother and baby alike.
Mother milk also boosts babys immune system, and decreases the baby's chances of developing asthma, gastrointestinal problems.




I can't wait to breast feed my child...my nipples are ready.

[FTJfag]

I want my woman to support me. And i'm not joking.

[FTJfag]

I want my woman to support me. And i'm not joking.

And I know I'm hot enough to make that happen.

[PreciousPari]

Oh, speaking of.......

It also causes involution of the uterus, so your body gets back in shape faster.
It fosters the mother-baby bond, which is beneficial to mother and baby alike.
Mother milk also boosts babys immune system, and decreases the baby's chances of developing asthma, gastrointestinal problems.




I can't wait to breast feed my child...my nipples are ready.

Yeah breast feeding your baby is a must! It reduces colic. Its also said that it makes them smarter and active in the future. lol I don't know how true that is but I did read that bit from a New Mothers magazine. :Oops:

[BC_Broad]

Yeah I know it does but what I mean is, I don't want to sit around home all day breast feeding, cooking, cleaning and all that jazz when I could be up and active. Cause to me, thats important. My babies are more important yes, and I will always come home to them. Cause once you leave work to take care of the kiddos, it gets hard to go back to work. I'll just use the breast pump and leave 10 bottles for my sus. lol

Nah, paternity leave for a guy is only like a month or two. I think. I'll make sure one of us is working or both! :p

ah, okay...i see what you mean. i kinda used to think the same way but a cousin of mine, who always favored being a career woman than going down the mommy track, had two kids in the past 4 years and hasn't returned to work. she looks completely drained and still manages to work out, help out with household duties and help run her husband's business. what he does is beyond me :p i guess its easy for us to say all this stuff since we don't have kids but im sure it will all change when we do.

[BC_Broad]

Oh, speaking of.......

It also causes involution of the uterus, so your body gets back in shape faster.
It fosters the mother-baby bond, which is beneficial to mother and baby alike.
Mother milk also boosts babys immune system, and decreases the baby's chances of developing asthma, gastrointestinal problems.




I can't wait to breast feed my child...my nipples are ready.

yeah, very true. lol your children are gonna be very lucky.

[Walktheline]

my friend's mom calls 'em "titty nipples"
isn't that creepy? TITTY NIPPLES!

[PreciousPari]

ah, okay...i see what you mean. i kinda used to think the same way but a cousin of mine, who always favored being a career woman than going down the mommy track, had two kids in the past 4 years and hasn't returned to work. she looks completely drained and still manages to work out, help out with household duties and help run her husband's business. what he does is beyond me :p i guess its easy for us to say all this stuff since we don't have kids but im sure it will all change when we do.

Yeah I agree, we say all this now and we end up doing the complete opposite when the time comes. I guess it takes one to know one? I have also seen my cousins go through this and they are housewives, mommys and they would do anything to go back to work! I want to be a career woman and I will be but I know I can find time to do both with some help. I mean our parents didn't read books or anything to raise us. lol My mom was laughing when I told her that my bf said he will do a lot of reading before the baby is born so that he can become the perfect dad. She's like, "Leh tah dass, aassi tenu changi tarah paleya nahi haiga? Book parhaan di ki laud haigi!?" :lol:

[PreciousPari]

Wow.

This is the weirdest shit I have read in a while.. lol ur mom makes more than your dad.. how the **** did that happen O_O

And there is something wrong with that?

[xogirlie girlxo]

well, i'm just pointing out that it's not an absolute.
ok.

[xogirlie girlxo]

This is a pretty good thread

[Canadian_jatti]

k i didnt have time to read all the posts but it seems there are a lot of guys who do not want der wives to work i think thas really backwards and traditional thinking but ultimately it would be a benefit to u guys becuz of the dual income and for raising kids properly u can never raise kids perfectly but they benefit the most from both parents not just one so if there dad is always workin they are not gonna turn out to be as "proper" as u had hoped

[umairhasmi83]

YES.WIth all the money they spend on college why not get some of it back.I never understand how some desi females say their goal in life is to be a housewife.Dont you have any goals for yourself? Basically you are saying that you feel that your purpose in the world was to cook,clean,make babies and take care of your inlaws??? I dont really care if my future wife makes any money or not but i want someone who has goals for the future.

[Walktheline]

YES.WIth all the money they spend on college why not get some of it back.I never understand how some desi females say their goal in life is to be a housewife.Dont you have any goals for yourself? Basically you are saying that you feel that your purpose in the world was to cook,clean,make babies and take care of your inlaws??? I dont really care if my future wife makes any money or not but i want someone who has goals for the future.


yeah, you're gonna be the first one complaing if your house gets messy, infant starts being fussy at 1 am, laundry's not done, and there's no hot food on your table.

[Shitface McGee]

Cause I'm gonna be the breadwinner. Her job is going to be to take care of the house and children. This is biologically the way its meant to be. I don't want my child being raised by a babysitter or a neighbor or by a teacher at school. She will nurture our children, and have them by her side at all times. Children learn by imitating adults, not by stupid fisher price toys or educational thingamajigs. When I come home from work, she'll have food ready in a nice clean house. She'll have plenty of time during the day to tend to herself and the kids. She'll exercise, watch the news, read books, learn about the world, take care of bills, paperwork, and basically maintain the homefront. I will provide absolutely anything she could possibly want and need and I'll show her how invaluable she is to my life. It'll be perfect.

some chick would have to be a major dumbass to be some career driven power on the go mom. i dont want to work after marriage hopefully i wont have to. i dont mind cooking and cleaning and looking after my kids especially in this society. duh thats what our parents did before we all landed here. im not into working after marriage i think it should be more of a domestic life, i mean its a guys job to provide for the family and the girls job to handle the house. wats wrong with that im up for it. and yea i hope women always get paid less than a guy so i can have more money to spend rather it going to some gori career dyke

[MrHarmfulOne]

I find it funny you hate seem hate the Brits and the Canadians, yet you behave just like them. Except in this case, your views set limits on our race, mine seek to remove those limits entire. I never said anything insuted your family or call you primitive, but the fact, the concept of a woman making more than a man is new to you shows that is proving my point. As for being your family's dream come true, your more like to be the oppressor, that tends to disagree with everyone but your self, because your never wrong right? That is what makes you primitive and backwards. You forget as well, I'm not trying to force my views on anyone, honestly you really can't, people have this little thing we call choice, and that allows them to make their own decision. Personally, I don't really have a construct of what it is to be desi, but it as though you do and well don't you think you might want to examine them just a bit? I made the point (yeah it's geeky, but the guys a computer geek anyways) if you can update your virus definition, its can't hurt your updating your points of view. Honestly, this world is changing whether you want to or not, my view is always that it never hurts learn from others and gain a new perspective


Naw, you said there's something wrong with desis when the woman isnt working. You said "that's the problem with desis".

Correction: Plummet said it but you agreed with it.

You just fucking implied that my family is doing something wrong. What, four nice cars, a nice house, and in a rich neighborhood is something wrong? You did insult my family. And I dont even wanna know why my mother needs to work. We are rich enough if you ask me.

[MrHarmfulOne]

k i didnt have time to read all the posts but it seems there are a lot of guys who do not want der wives to work i think thas really backwards and traditional thinking but ultimately it would be a benefit to u guys becuz of the dual income and for raising kids properly u can never raise kids perfectly but they benefit the most from both parents not just one so if there dad is always workin they are not gonna turn out to be as "proper" as u had hoped

If you knew werent so ignorant, you would realize that it's mostly the mother that bears the most importance on the psyche of the children.

Yes, a father is always important but a mother is more important.

Multiple well done studies have been done on this.

Personally, I love kids. when I have one, I will probably spend as much of my free time with him as possible when he's/she's young.

[MrHarmfulOne]

:wtf: , NOBODY has brainwashed me into thinking I'm inferior. Should I have an overdeveloped and unwarranted superiority complex instead? How does being modern make you inferior. I I'm sorry to tell you but the desis girls around her seem to be embracing a more progressive stance. Guys having view like your is probably one of the reason why more desis girls are pursuing interracial relationships, which is cool as well

I dont care what they do. They can date 20 black guys, 20 indians, 20 white guys, 20 mexicans all at once. I dont mind interracial relationships/marriages.

And look at how you call yourself "modern" and not just "different".

You use modern as if it is somehow better to desi culture. You ARE brainwashed.

[phatty]

im going to work
and make my hubby take care of the house work

[MrHarmfulOne]

Way to insult someone's family and upbringing. And you seem to find women inferior as well (which is undoubtedly your misguided main reason for delegating them to housework and raising kids) And if I recall correctly you're anti-social too. The only loathsome desi here is you.

1. He insulted my family. Why the hell dont you troll him also?

2. I never said women were inferior.

3. Im not really anti-social. I do have alot of friends. At University I just dont do much. Im sorry, am I too uncool cuz I dont get drunk everynight? -_-; Im deeply offended >_>

[Omna82]

If I have children, I want to be a stay-at-home-mom.. I've decided on this a long time ago, just based on my observation of being a child of two working parents. If we REALLY need the extra income, I would probably set up a private practice in a walk-in basement or first floor of our house and only provide treatment and evaluations for 5-10 clients at the most.

[umairhasmi83]

yeah, you're gonna be the first one complaing if your house gets messy, infant starts being fussy at 1 am, laundry's not done, and there's no hot food on your table.
Well if u have most parents like most desis do then im sure ur kids grandma or grandpa wont mind babysitting while u and ur wife works.For the most part my grandma raised me because my dad was an airline pilot while my mom was a bank executive.I was actually more upset when my grandma died compared to my dad because she used to look after me since i was born until the time she died.

[ShivaChrist]

outside the home?

Of course, this assumes you plan on getting/are married.

Personally, no I dont.

If she rakes in a TON of cash, hell yeah. My wife (if I marry the girl that I'm currently with) is a fashion designer, and her stuff is HOT. I'm hoping she'll work from home so we can shag a lot and still make tons of money - but if she wants to work out of the house as well, I wouldn't mind TOO much, as long as its worth it... I need money to buy more flatscreen TV's!!!

[hmguy]

Naw, you said there's something wrong with desis when the woman isnt working. You said "that's the problem with desis".

Correction: Plummet said it but you agreed with it.

You just fucking implied that my family is doing something wrong. What, four nice cars, a nice house, and in a rich neighborhood is something wrong? You did insult my family. And I dont even wanna know why my mother needs to work. We are rich enough if you ask me.

Correction...I never said you views maybe flawed, your the one who brought your family into this...FYI...I can call myself progessive because they're in line with the change in social climate, women working, dual income families, etc. You just seem to dismiss these notion completely with an even addressing the issues, rather you would like to hide behind the "personal attack" excuse, maybe because you really can't expound on the subject matter. Futhermore, what the hell does your family income and social status have to do with anything? Are your saying that the only way to been rich is to have a conservative views? Honestly I and I'm sure everyone else really doesn't care how many cars your have or whether your mom can afford to not work, but then again thats your parents money not yours isn't it? I'm curious if you brought up because I mentioned that my mom worked 3 jobs, sorry to tell you that that was over 20 yrs ago and alot has changed, needless to say my family has even enough by Manhattan standards, though thats a fact I normally like to keep to myself, with the exception of people like your that try to show off how rich they are, when in reality they have no idea what rich is from a moral sense or a monetary sense. I'm surprised thought college for me was always about diversity, learning about new cultures and perspectives, I guess everyone's experience is differrent, but I had though at least being in school would make you less conservative. The only person here that's brainwashed is you...for believe that anyone that disagrees with your views is stupid, ignorant, etc. Honestly I just wanted to discuss a topic, but you don't care to hear anything but the sound of your own voice. Sad really...you call yourself Mr.HarmfulOne..but the only one your harming is yourself.

[Canadian_jatti]

If you knew werent so ignorant, you would realize that it's mostly the mother that bears the most importance on the psyche of the children.

Yes, a father is always important but a mother is more important.

Multiple well done studies have been done on this.

Personally, I love kids. when I have one, I will probably spend as much of my free time with him as possible when he's/she's young.
hahaha it has nothin to do wit being ignorant i actually have some educational backround on this stuff and i dunt know what kinda studies u looked at but i have also seen alot of studies that support my opinion aighty

[MrHarmfulOne]

Correction...I never said you views maybe flawed, your the one who brought your family into this...FYI...I can call myself progessive because they're in line with the change in social climate, women working, dual income families, etc. You just seem to dismiss these notion completely with an even addressing the issues, rather you would like to hide behind the "personal attack" excuse, maybe because you really can't expound on the subject matter. Futhermore, what the hell does your family income and social status have to do with anything? Are your saying that the only way to been rich is to have a conservative views? Honestly I and I'm sure everyone else really doesn't care how many cars your have or whether your mom can afford to not work, but then again thats your parents money not yours isn't it? I'm curious if you brought up because I mentioned that my mom worked 3 jobs, sorry to tell you that that was over 20 yrs ago and alot has changed, needless to say my family has even enough by Manhattan standards, though thats a fact I normally like to keep to myself, with the exception of people like your that try to show off how rich they are, when in reality they have no idea what rich is from a moral sense or a monetary sense. I'm surprised thought college for me was always about diversity, learning about new cultures and perspectives, I guess everyone's experience is differrent, but I had though at least being in school would make you less conservative. The only person here that's brainwashed is you...for believe that anyone that disagrees with your views is stupid, ignorant, etc. Honestly I just wanted to discuss a topic, but you don't care to hear anything but the sound of your own voice. Sad really...you call yourself Mr.HarmfulOne..but the only one your harming is yourself.

i never said others were ignorant. you and plummet said to paraphrase" you are whats wrong with society"

Since my family seems to think the same thing, maybe they are also whats wrong with society.

I only brought up our wealth because I wanted to show you we cant be that wrong, when so much is going right.

and screw becoming a little hippy at college... I come here to learn, meet some girls, and get my degree. I didnt come here to open my mind or whatever people supposedly do.

[350z]

yes! and if she makes more money that me, who cares! as long we love each other it's all good.

[SIXPAK GQ]

outside the home?

Of course, this assumes you plan on getting/are married.

Personally, no I dont.


dont plan on getting married but

but of course i want a stable g/f who works and has a stable job....

[raja2102]

im gonna let her decide..
if she likes it .. i'll let her.. if she doesnt .. she wont have to

[SexyTemptress]

i'll probably head back to work after the kids start school. i just find it boring to just sit at home and take care of the house and wait for my man to come home.

[Ac89]

ifi ever do find a woman to get married to...i'd love it if she works!

[DESI-PEACHES]

haha.. that's perfect.. but really.. why would a girl go through so many years of education (I assume she's educated) just so that she can be a stay at home wife.

Exactly!! I got my Masters just recently n there is no way am stayin at home lookin after house and kids (if i get any) its so not my kind of thing

[Roshii]

i rather work than stay at home and clean

[DESI-PEACHES]

i rather work than stay at home and clean
:yes:

[MrAttitude]

Usually gurls like to have some liberty and they want some freedom from their hubby so if someday muh wifey wants to work and all i'd never stop her cuz everyone has the right to lead their life they want to so as long we both share enough time with each other i really dont mind if she works or not :d'oh:

[xxgal]

outside the home?

Of course, this assumes you plan on getting/are married.

Personally, no I dont.

ya ya i noh im a gal n u want guyz answerin that but i thought i'd answer 4 my guy since hes not into computers n chatin n all that..... my guy doesnt eva want me to work afta marriage .. he wants me to look afta the house n kidz.. i mean he doesnt mind me takin part in activities outside da house.. like drama classes..etc... but he jus feelz i dont need to work coz he can provide.. well then again hes well off....lolzzz

[xxgal]

i rather work than stay at home and clean

hun i dont understand y women think that if they dont work .. all they gonna do is clean n cook.. i mean u can do so many fun activities.. like join a drama school... take up reflexology classes... i mean they r sooo many fun thingz to do in life other then jus workin.. i wud prefer enjoyin life to my fullest.. i HATE workin for people .. i like to b my own boss n thats y my man says that if i eva wanna work i ccan start up my own businss.. he'll support me in that too... n besides.. kidz n family is fun..

[MrHarmfulOne]

man, we need more progressive thinkers like you on RD. I've been reading your posts and wow! i mean most of the people on this site are stupid..and there are the intelligent "verbose" posters -but even some of the intelligent ones are NOT as open-minded and culturally open to new perspectives as you are. man, how come you haven't been posting more?

oh yeah, the guy your replying to...hates whites/jews too.

Even if I allegedly DO hate white/jews, how does that alter anything I said in this thread?

You really are retarded.

[MrHarmfulOne]

uh....you made a thread saying how you hate whites/jews, and said that you were "molested by one." i believe. That just futhur proves your ignorance.

Wow, it's so nice having a fan on these boards :)

[Air]

whatever makes her happy. i plan on being a doctor (like most desis) so if she wants to work to achieve personal goals than thats cool, if she wants to stay at home and hang out with her stay-at-home friends than thats cool too. actually if she stays at home she would probably stay better looking cause she wont be stressed out.. but that could work inversly as well.. you don't go out so u don't maintain yourself.

[Liquid Smoke]

up to her

[xocutieondutiexo]

the guys probably need money :p

[ladoo ram]

the guys probably need money :pwhat if he makes gud money? would u still work?

[roh@n]

life would b better for both of us if we both work. plus our kids will b smart. it depends on how much time we spend wit dem and how well we beat there ass lol

:dance3: :p

[FiStiK]

Cause I'm gonna be the breadwinner. Her job is going to be to take care of the house and children. This is biologically the way its meant to be. I don't want my child being raised by a babysitter or a neighbor or by a teacher at school. She will nurture our children, and have them by her side at all times. Children learn by imitating adults, not by stupid fisher price toys or educational thingamajigs. When I come home from work, she'll have food ready in a nice clean house. She'll have plenty of time during the day to tend to herself and the kids. She'll exercise, watch the news, read books, learn about the world, take care of bills, paperwork, and basically maintain the homefront. I will provide absolutely anything she could possibly want and need and I'll show her how invaluable she is to my life. It'll be perfect.

I'm a girl and I agree wholeheartedly with this. In an ideal world, it would be the perfect way to raise a family.
North American families these days...you have parents too busy to spend time with their kids, people pop pills like candy for depression, etc., etc...there isn't any cohesion in the family circuit at all.

I would still like to have a career, maybe I would write a bit on the side, do something part time, but if I have kids, I'm going to damn well make sure I'm doing a good job raising them. That doesn't mean my husband will be a bystander, both parents will obviously be hands on, but I want to be that kind of full time mother.

Also, I rarely do this, but I commend these lads for having that point of view. Most men these days want a woman who can cook, manage a household, AND bring in the dough. That neither shows respect for her nor for their family. Kudos, boys.

[scorpio05678]

life would b better for both of us if we both work. plus our kids will b smart. it depends on how much time we spend wit dem and how well we beat there ass lol

:dance3: :p
Agreed:)

my bird already works.

Personally I don't have a problem with it. As far as raising kids goes it's not only upto women it's both mine and her responsiblity and ofcourse there should be some time (and QUALITY TIME ) that we both can spend togather.

SC

[cold-hearted]

i dont' want a trophy wife so she needs to work.

[Gh0Sty2K]

To be honest with you, id prefer my wife to work, personally I just think sitting at home and doing repetitive tasks all day, and day after day can be considerably boring and very unsocial, besides one can only do this for so long before going nuts. With regards to kids, most desi families have grandparents who would love to tend to the kids during the day if both husband and wife are at work, if this don’t work for you, then I am sure its still possible to have kids and both work, many people around the world do this successfully, its no big deal.

Also, some folks have said here that they would work their ass off as much as possible to tend to their partner who has opted to stay at home, this wouldn’t work for me, I just feel that this could raise the pressure and workload to a level where eventually you would argue at home, and or bring work home, its not right and can only go on for some time before you crack. The idea of both partners working means sharing the workload, and if you can do that with work, then running a house when you get back aint such a difficult task.

Id like my wife to have her own views and goals, id be marrying my partner for the rest of our lives, the last thing id want to do is lock them up in a box, and lock them away from outside contacts and social activities, it sucks.

And for those of you who want all that nonsense about coming home to a clean house with food on the table, that don’t work for me either, I mean im sure both husband and wife would be capable of staying in a clean environment, except maybe on the odd days where I am sure the mess would speak for itself :) and with regards to cooking the food, I think id like to cook food together and have some fun at the same time, make use of our time, it can be considerably fun, you’d miss that opportunity if you only ever came home when the meal was ready on the table.

Lol what makes me laugh the most is that if you’re the type of guy or girl who prefers their partner to stay at home and raise the kids, then if your kids end up messed up, your most likely gonna blame the partner who stayed at home to tend to them, lol where in reality, staying at home and tending to the kids continuously day after day offers no guarantee what so ever that your kids would be brought up right in the first place, it actually just sounds more like insecurity.

[appenzeller]

Well, not really. I would like it that she's home when I'm home so that we get to spend time together.