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View Full Version : LOL the funniest female/mex/****** jokes i've ever heard!!


himynamesmo
March 18th, 2004, 11:56 AM
What do you call the useless skin around the vagina?
The woman! -jeremy


Wanna hear a funny joke?
"Womens Rights"! -jeremy


Why do women have two sets of lips?
So they can piss & moan at the same time! -mike


Why did God give more brains to woman than a cow?
So that when you play with her tits she won't shit on the floor! -eGod


How do you turn a dishwasher into a snowblower?
Get the bitch a shovel!


Why can't Helen Keller drive?
She's a woman!


What do your pregnant girlfriend and a slinky have in common?
They both need a push down the stairs.


What do you tell a women with two black eyes?
Nothing! She's already been told twice!


What do women and meat have in common?
The more you beat them the more tender they get!


Why do women have such small feet?
So they can stand closer to the counter! -Drew


Why don't women need a drivers liscence?
There aren't any roads from the kitchen to the bedroom.


What do 3 million abused women do wrong every year?
They don't fuckin' listen!

mex:

What do you call a little mexican?
A paragraph, because he's not quite an essay. -Mike


Why aren't there any spics on Star Trek?
They won't work in the future either!


What do you call a gang of spics running down a hill?
Jailbreak!


Why do blacks put their garbage in clear bags?
So puerto ricans can window shop! -jesse


Why do spics drive lowriders?
So they can drive while they pick strawberries.


What do you call a mexican getting baptised?
Bean dip! -shaun


What do you call a building full of spics?
A jail! -kris


What do you call two mexicans playing basketball?
Juan on Juan!


What do you call a spic with a rubber toe?
Roberto!


How do you kill a mexican?
Throw a quarter off a cliff. -slater


What do you get when you breed a black and a mexican?
A theif who's too lazy to steal!


Why don't mexicans have barbecues?
The beans keep falling through the grill! -ronnie


What did the spic say when his home fell on him?
Get off me holmes!! -habitat


How do you find the richest spic in town?
Drop a penny, whoever catches it is the richest spic!


Why do mexicans eat tamales on christmas?
So they'll have something to unwrap!


Why were there only 40,000 mexicans at the Alamo?
They only have two cars!


How do you start a mexican parade?
Roll a quarter down the street! -Elden


A mexican and a ****** are riding in car . . who's driving?
A cop!


How do you hide money from a mexican?
Hide it under a bar of soap! -Christina


Why is there no mexican olympic team?
All the spics who can run, jump or swim are in the U.S.!


Why is a spic like a pizza?
They're both small, greasy and speak no english!


What is a Mexican without a lawnmower?
Unemployed! -c


Why do mexicans like tiny steering wheels?
It make it easier to drive while handcuffed! -Gogo

******:

What do you call a ****** with a peg leg?
Shit on a stick! -joe


Why do ******s always have sex on their minds?
Because they have pubes on their heads! -Bo


What does Pontiac stand for?
Pool Old ****** Thinks It's A Cadillac! -ricky


Did you hear the one about . .
. . the baby ****** who went to heaven and got his wings? He said, "God! Look! I'm an angel!", and God said, "No you stupid ******! You're a bat, now eff off!"


I like black people . . .
. . I used to have some black friends 'till my dad sold them!


What does a nigress and an ice hockey player have in common?
They both change their pads after 3 periods! -ashmoor


Why do blacks have white hands and feet?
They were on all fours when God spray painted them!


Why do black people have white hands?
They were up against the wall when God spray painted them!


Why do black people have white hands?
Everyone has some good in them! -bonz


Why do black people have white hands?
It rubs off the cop cars! -bonz


Why do more ******s get hit by cars in the winter?
They're easier to spot! -brenden






What do you call two blacks on one bike?
Organized crime! -bobo


Why are ******s getting stronger?
T.V.s are getting bigger! -tim

himynamesmo
March 18th, 2004, 12:14 PM
A ****** walks into a bar and says, "Yo! Where do all the homies hang?". The bartender says, "out there", pointing to a tree in the back

lool^^

himynamesmo
March 18th, 2004, 12:17 PM
What did God say when he made the first ******?
Oops! Burnt another one! -Nick


Why haven't any ******s died from West Nile virus?
Mosquitos don't land on shit, only flies do! -eGod

himynamesmo
March 18th, 2004, 12:19 PM
How do you know if a chink robbed your house?
Your homework is done, your computer is upgraded, but two hours later the chink is still trying to back out of your driveway!

himynamesmo
March 18th, 2004, 12:22 PM
Four fags are sitting in a hot tub. They notice some sperm rising to the surface. One fag says, "Ok, who farted?"

Irreligious Left
March 18th, 2004, 01:21 PM
What does a nigress and an ice hockey player have in common?
They both change their pads after 3 periods! -ashmoor

This is just plain gross in addition to being tasteless.

bitchh
March 18th, 2004, 02:23 PM
oh, i got one! i got one!

ok, i was too lazy to read the jokes above. i hope this isn't a repeat.

why were so many blacks killed in the vietnam war??

because when the sargeant said to "get down", they all got up and started dancing.

hahhahahaha!!!! i remember that from grade school!

truly tasteless jokes.

illomatic
March 18th, 2004, 03:24 PM
Three guys, a Sindhi, a Gujarati and a Sardar are standing on a street corner in new york city talking about how much each makes.

Suddenly a crazed bum comes up to them. In his hand he holds a hypodermic needle. "Listen!" he says to the gujarati, "I need you to take out your wallet and give me all of your money." Timidly the gujarati man says, "Why should i give you my hard-earned paisa?" "Because" says the crazed bum, "I have this here hypodermic needle and guess what. It's contaminated with hiv. I'm going to stab your ass with it if you don't give me all of your money."

"Hai re," says the gujarati, pulling his cash from his wallet, handing it to the bum and putting his hands together. $10. please just don't stab me."

Next is the sindhi guy. "see this hypodermic needle? I stab your ass with it and you'll be talking to jhoole lal twenty to thirty years ahead of schedule," says the bum. "here sir," says the sindhi guy pulling a stack of bills from his wallet. "$100. Please just don't stab me."

Last is the sikh. "See this needle says the bum? It's infected with hiv." "I have no fear of you!" The sikh says to the bum. "I am a sikh! The son of a lion. Stab me with the needle if you want. But i will not give you even a single note of my hard-earned paisa!"

"A tough guy huh?" says the bum. He jabs the sikh right in the ass with the needle and bolts away. The gujarati and sindhi are in awe of the sikh's display of bravery. "Why didn't you give the bum your money?" they ask.

The Sardar, shakes his head " Mainu Aids Waids da ki dar, main ta Condom Paya hoya hai" (I am not afraid of AIDS. I am wearing a condom.)

mr photographer
November 3rd, 2005, 06:11 AM
:(

don't know how ur doing it sohail...

in my prayers as always

:love:

i dont know how im doing it either, but i think im gonna break soon :(

Geezer
November 3rd, 2005, 06:12 AM
Hoehail stop bumping the old topics :anger:

Lust Buster
November 3rd, 2005, 12:46 PM
You're so stupid, you shoved a battery up your butt & said "I have the power."

musicchic33
November 3rd, 2005, 12:54 PM
loll was he/she banned bc of the jokes?? :sarb:

they were kinda funny :neutral: